Huggies Forum

Huggies® Ultimate
Newborn Nappies

Learn More

Poem/Story - The Middle Wife Lock Rss

Hi, was given this when i was preggers with my first and just had to share it. It's long but worth the read.

Just when you think you’ve heard all the kids stories you can stand…
THE MIDDLE WIFE
By an anonymous second grade teacher

I’ve been teaching now for about 15 years, I have 2 kids of myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back.
When I was a kid, I loved Show and Tell. So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get over shyness. Usually show and tell is pretty tame. Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that, and I never ever place boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it to school and talk about it, they’re welcome to do so.

Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid, takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow stuffed under her sweater. She holds up a snap shot of an infant. “This is Luke, my baby brother, and I’m going to tell you about his birthday.”
“First, Mom and Dad made him as s symbol of their love, and then Dad put a seed in my Mom’s stomach , and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord.”
She was standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I’m trying not to laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The kids are watching her in amazement. “Then, about two Saturdays ago my Mom starts saying and going ‘Oh, oh, oh!’ Erica puts her hand behind her back and groans. “ she walked around the house for, like an hour, ‘Oh, oh, oh!’
Now the kids doing this hysterical duck walk, holding her back and groaning. “My Dad called The Middle Wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn’t have a sign on the car like the Domino’s man.” “they got Mom to lie down in bed like this.” Then Erica lies down with her back against the wall. “And then, POP! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case she got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed like Psshhheew!” This kid has her legs spread with her little hands miming water flowing away. It was too much!
“Then, The Middle Wife starts saying breath, breath.”
“Then they started counting, but never got past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff, they said it was from Moms play centre, so there must be a lot of stuff in there.”

Then Erica stood up and took a big theatrical bow and returned to her seat. I’m sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, if it’s show and tell day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another Erica comes along.

Again Sorry it so long but it just to funny.
that is so funny thankyou for sharing this story

Rylee 2 big brother to Tyler mummy angel boys

This is so cute....thanks for sharing it with us

2 little angels,17 months and one on the inside

Sign in to follow this topic