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1st time alone and scared Lock Rss

After telling my partner I was pregnant, we broke up because he didn't want it. I am only 7 weeks in, and so scared I will miscarry. I know nobody can tell me what will happen, but I don't know how to cope. I have a great family and friends, but there's nothing like having a partner, especially when you are fearful of something. Last year my father died of lymphoma, and in May my cousin committed suicide, so I honestly don't think I have it in me to survive any more grief.
Hi isiis. Well what a terrible time you must be going through. It is scary being pregnant at the best of times. Then you have your hormones which are all over the place...........
It sounds like you are a very strong person to have come this far. In the words of Eleanor Roosevelt
" You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience which you must stop and look fear in the face........ You must do the thing you think you cannot do". Its a terrible thing your ex partner did but at least he was honest right from the start and you wouldnt want that sort of person in your childs life anyway. You dont mention if you are having any medical problems to fear a miscarriage or if you just have a bad feeling. When I was pregnant I had a very dark discharge sort of like the colour of old blood. It would start and stop and when it started it use to freak me out. It wasnt until months later when I spoke to a few people that I realised that was common. It is a very common thing to be worried about having a miscarriage but try not to let it take over your lovely experience of having a baby. I didnt know I was pregnant until around 6 weeks. I just took a home pregnancy test as I was going out with friends and would be drinking alcohol. We had only just started trying so I thought I had months and months to wait. I was very shocked when it came back as positive. Even though our baby was planned and I am married I was still very scared. We had just had a months holiday and did all the heavy landscaping around our house. Here I was shoveling, pushing the wheel barrow, speading turf and even using this huge machine for paving. I had no idea I was pregnant. What I am trying to say is babies are pretty tough and although you shouldnt do what I was doing or take any unnecessary chances all you can do is take care and let nature take its course. Dont forget to rest and take time for yourself, you deserve it. Try to remain positive and hope for the best. Try not to obsess about it, I know this can be easier said than done, but remember you are over half way to 3 months so not long now. I believe your father will be looking after you so try to remember that and it should help. Life can be very hard at times but perhaps the hard things are over for you and you are now on your way back up. Good luck with everything I hope it all works out for you. Just remember to breath and to take the time to smell the roses. Take care.
Hi isiis.
I have just had my first baby. I completely understand that it is scary, but ill tell you what.
Once you have that baby, nothing compares. It is the most wonderful experience. Yes it is hard and is even harder as a single mum, but as you say, you have great family and friends surrounding you. If you ex partner does not want anything to do with this wonderful child that the two of you have created, then you are better off without him anyway.
I have a good friend who has just lost her father and has since found out she is pregnant so I am aware of how hard this may be for you.
I enjoy every moment of being a mother because I too had a great family and bunch of friends around me to support me.
Being a mother is such a wonderful thing and having a child that you have given birth to, who loves you unconditionally, and knows that YOU and you ALONE are MUMMY, that is just so wonderful.

Dont let your ex partner bring this down for you. If you are going to go through with the pregnancy, involve your family and friends, im sure they will all love to accompany you to the ultrasounds etc.

You can do this if you want to, and youll be damn good at it too.
Don't be scared. There are so many women out there who have nobody but themselves and the baby thats growing inside of them. Rely on your family and friends as much as you need to. They will give you strength. Just think, there is this tiny person who is relying on you to take care of yourself. That same someone will love you so much just for allowing him/her the opportunity to be born. Get plenty of rest, eat well and enjoy the changes you're going through. Trust me, once you look into the eyes of your newborn it will all be worth it!


Thankyou all so much for your words of wisdom. On the 13th of September I had a miscarriage. At least now I know I really do want to be a mum, so all is not lost I suppose. I am back at work today with a new hairdo and some new clothes. I couldn't bear to look at myself in the mirror and recognise the person I looked like when I was pregnant.

Thankyou again. I hope one day to visit this forum with some good news.
Hi Isiis,

So sorry to hear your news! Words cannot heal your pain, but time will help! Talk and cry as much as you need to, if you can't do that with family or a friend, see your Dr.

Thinking of you,

DD5, DS3, DS lost to SIDS at 6mths & DD6m


I am 16 weeks pregnant, the one thing that you need to do is to keep strong and remember how wonderful that little baby inside you is. It is a special gift to have the chance to raise a family of your own, It sounds like you have a great family and freinds who will be there for you when you give birth and a long time after that. Please dont stress and worry and you will be fine, the first time you have the scan or hear the heart beat you will feel amazing and having the re-asurence that the baby is ok is a load off your mind. I went through all the being scared, being happy, being worried and thinking is this the right time to have a baby, My husband and i had been trying for 1 year and i still think is this the right time sometimes but i know it is a blessing.
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