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Girlfriend's guide to being a new mum Lock Rss

I am putting together a humourous yet relevant (and postiive) guide for my girlfriend as a gift when she has her baby. You know things that your girlfriend should tell you about being a new mum eg "Don't ever tell a new mum she looks tired - she already knows!!!!" Tell her she is "doing a great job". etc. I would be interested in any other "tips" from other mums. Thanks

Victoria ~ 3yr old beautiful twin boys

hey twin mum!! that is a fantastic idea ... but alas wink i have no witty tips for you to add at the moment ... i will put my thinking cap on, and get back to you when something 'pops up'!! good luck and have fun with it!!

eìí? well ... it started with a kiss eìí?-3-064

Hi twin mum,
how can you think up such a grat idea with 2 babies?,
My Mum 'advised' me in the first few sleep deprivied weeks to sleep when the baby sleeps....I soon found out that this did not help me do the dishes!, but we have learn't to love the taste of frozen lasagne on paper plates if it means a few extra zzz's in the day!.
I have also discovered that PJ's are the new Day wear - cosmo just hasn't caught on yet!
good luck with the book
Elz
hi twin mum,
that really is a great idea! maybe you should try and get a book like that published. i was the first of my girlfriends to have a baby, so now that they are all catching up, they are always asking advice etc, and its often better to recieve it in a witty, humerous way then coming across condisending and critizing. my mum and MIL always had advice for me, but it always come across as critisism and it made me so angry. even now with baby number 2 MIL has an opinion on everything and she has only seen him twice since he was born 7 weeks ago. another thing that p*sses me off is when the grandparents do things with the kids that i dont approve of. like putting nuttela on my babys dummy, he is only 7 weeks old for godsakes! i totally wish i had a friend who could give me advice in such a nice way! good luck with it, im sure your girlfriend will love it!

The Deeks 07/08/02, Googie 23/11/04

Hi Sam,

Thanks for your response. I am thinking about getting a pocket sized book published. As a new mum you cannot avoid advice - it's like it comes immediately when they cut the cord or something.

Girlfriends have a special bond between them - they can say things things that no one else can say to you. I have been fortunate enough to have my best friend in my life for 16 years and I think she deserves to know "the truth" about motherhood (ha ha).

And the whole nutella thing would have sent me into a spiral as well.!!!! Remember when you close the door at night it is you and ONLY your decisions that matter for the well being of your baby.

Thanks for your response.

Victoria ~ 3yr old beautiful twin boys

Hi Twin Mum

The stupidist thing i was told while i was pregnant was to "get plenty of sleep cause your gunna need it after the baby is born" WHAT!!!!!! its not like you can save it up too use later. My advice would be enjoy not being a pack horse while you can cause after bubs is here you need everything AND the kitchen sink!!

DD 19/10/03 & Trainee Doula

im keeping an eye on this thread cause i love hearing good advice. maybe you should make a list of totally usless advice that your friend should ignore, like that in previous post.

The Deeks 07/08/02, Googie 23/11/04

Hi How about "If you forget to take your mini pill 1 day don't worry because the 2 legged pill is sure to work". We often refer to our little bundle of joy as "The Red mini pill" (he is red headed) as his timing is perfect little fun lover smile

mum to 5

Hi Twin Mum

The best piece of advice I would give anyone having a baby is "if it works for you, do it" or in other words "do what makes sense to you".

It seems to me that there is more than one way of doing just about everything and if you decide to do it one way the next person you meet will tell you that you're doing it the wrong way!

Even in hospital every nurse had a different opinion and it drove me insane to try and follow everyone's advice. You name it - breastfeeding positions, length of time of each breast, using a dummy or not, how to wrap the baby - everybody had an opinion and each one was different.

Find someone who you trust, who makes sense and follow their advice. Listen to everyone else (it's only polite really) but do what makes sense to you!

Hope this makes sense. Good luck with your book.

Jodie, Sydney, CJ born 5/12/03

Couldn't agree more CJ's mum, the amount of conflicting advice you get from different midwives before you even leave hospital can send you bonkers.
The best advice I can give someone is, (and please don't be shocked by this ,I do mean it with a great deal of love),
Ignore your child- or should I say don't jump at your child everytime it murmurs.
I have a 2.5 yr old who I used to have forever in my arms or rocking to sleep or attached to the boob, the husband would say shes crying shes hungry----------"NOT always". Also don't let family and friends pick them up all the time, especially when they are sleeping and they see their eyes open, "aahh their awake" and they pick them up straight away, No they are in REM and are sending themselves back to sleep, Does any one remember those days?
I hope some of this is making sense.
I also have 4 week old twins, I feed, they get lots of cuddles then, they get changed,wrapped into bed. They put themselves to sleep and have done since birth. I haven't got time too rock both too sleep. I am waiting though for this to all explode.

Sydney,twin boys 22/10/04+girl 26/03/02

Thanks for all the replies - see experience is worth bottling. I never knew half these things before I had kids. Another piece of advice I have is GET TOUGH. In the beginning it was such a daze and I did not have the strength to say no to grandparents etc. Now I tell them (nicely) that when they are here at 2am and 3am and every other time the babies get up because you over stimulated them THEN you have the right to decide, until then the decisions are ALL MINE. I have not waivered from this with ANYONE. My boys are in a routine and have boundaries that I don's shift for anyone else. That does not mean that don't just do things - it just means that I am much better at knowing what will work for them and WHAT WON'T. Keep the advice coming the book is filling fast.

PS Twins - how fantastic.

Victoria ~ 3yr old beautiful twin boys

gewle,

That is so funny - you are absolutely right about the sleep and I don't know how many times I heard that as well.

That advice will definitely be going in the guide - along with enjoy not being a pack horse, enjoy your "romantic" time with your partner (you cannot save that either) and learn to say NO (to whoever you need to).

Victoria ~ 3yr old beautiful twin boys

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