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  5. "Time Out" didn't work - What do I do now?

"Time Out" didn't work - What do I do now? Lock Rss

I watched the Nanny so I know the general rule but I have been putting off Time Out for some time now - perhaps it was my lack of conficience in executing it successfully.

On the weekend friends came over & I watched how the mother put Time Out into practice. My 21mth daughter Kristina watched too. As I watched the little boy I told myself it was time I put the method into practice with Kristina, especially now that she knows how it works.

This morning at 11:30am while I was feeding my newborn Ivana, Kristina was misbehaving (throwing stuff behind the TV. And when I shook my head at her & gave Kristina dirty looks she did it even more.

So I took the courage to try Time Out. I placed Kristina in the same corner the little boy was placed in & told her to stay there until I come for her but she didn't listen. Kristina kept on standing up & walking away & I kept on telling her off & placing her back in the corner. Sometimes I would point to the corner & tell her to return but she wouldn't so I would pick her up or drag her to the spot. I was getting tired but she persitted. She cried throughout the duration but she never managed to sit there for longer than a minute. It seemed to go on forever & I wanted to quit as I had to attend to Ivana (change her nappy & offer her the remaining 40ml milk). Time was slipping & I began to sweat & had to take action quickly (I'm diabetic & at the time I was low on sugar, this condition is often referred to as a Hypo. Some symptoms of a Hypo include: sweating, shaking, not making sense, inability to string a sentence together, tiredness, etc.). As it dragged on Kristina got up & out of her place a lot quicker. I was getting nowhere with Time Out & soon I had to eat lunch (routine is important for diabetics) & I knew that putting Kristina in her highchair & attempting to feed her would be a joke & I didn't want to go through a worse experience than the one we were already having. It was 12:50am & I decided to pick Kristina up, change her nappy & put her to bed as she normally has her afternoon sleep at 1:00pm. It terrified me to think that she might refuse & walk out of the bedroom after I put her down but I had to take the chance. Luckily it worked & I attended to Ivana & had some lunch. My plan was to give Kristina her afternoon milk once she woke up so she wouldn't be too hungry.

I made some pretty silly mistakes but did the best I could at the time. And as a result Kristina missed out on lunch, Ivana didn't want the remaining milk & I had a Hypo.

I told my husband about the experience when he called home during his lunch break. He suggested that next time I feed Ivana I should put on Kristina's favourite DVD first. He was very disappointed that Kristina missed out on lunch.

I feel like a failure & that Kristina does not respect me. If you are struggling with Time Out or have any advice on how to execute Time Out successfully I would love to hear from you.

Vic, 3 girls

Don't feel bad, we all try things that don't go well. But something important to know about the Super Nanny tips she doesn't recomend the time out tip until atleast 2 1/2. She says this in her book so maybe your little one is just to young for it to work.
I am sure your little one loves and respects you very much it's just part of being a toddler. If you want to pursue time outs I suggest getting the Super Nanny book as it is very helpful in helping you understand what to do and why. Good luck.
Mummy V
I have no constructive thoughts on your situation cos Im not there yet with my 15 mth old. But I hope your hubby was helpful/sympathetic with you with what you have to go through each day with 2 under 2.

If he's only thoughts were "why didn't she have lunch" Id be slapping him round abit LOL wink

He's going to need to back you up with your discipline not undermind you so make sure you keep an eye on that!!

Steph smile

Steph VIC Mummy to one gorgeous boy

my little girl was similar to this and would not sit still so we put her in a porta cot so she had to take a time out. persistance is the key, if you let her win just once she thinks shes in charge of you. after a while all we had to say when she was mis behaving was "would you like to sit in the cot by yourself?" and she would shake her head to say no and be good again. i felt bad telling her off at first but now i get more respect and when shes good she gets rewards. your eldest may only be playing up to get your attention.when the baby is having a nap devote some time just for her, call it"mummy daughter time" read her favourite story to her while having a cuddle, she may behave better if she thinks shes getting special attention like the baby is.

heidi, sa, baby girl 29/10/02

Hi,

Don't give up on time out. I was one of these mums who used to smack. I got to the point where my 2 yo was not responding at all to smacking, i could smack him 20 times in a row and he'd still go back and do exactly what he was doing! So we watched the super nanny, and picked up the time out technique. We have a "Naughty Cushion" where my son has to sit for just 2 mins if he is naughty. At the start, it worked really well, as i don't think he really understood it, but he got to the point where he thought it was a game and kept rising from the naughty cushion. You just have to persist and keep putting them back, as like someone has said, if you let them get away with it even once, they will hold it over you forever. Now my little boy sits on the naughty cushion for between 1-1/2 & 2 mins, i reckon as long as it is close enough it is good enough, as the idea is to take their attention off what they were doing when they were being naughty!

Keep at it, don't give in! I know you have a pretty tough situation to deal with, having 2 under 2's and diabetes...... but keep it up, consistency is the key!

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