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Two year old tantrums HELP Lock Rss

Hi Mums

My daughter turned two in October and up until this last week or so did not really throw tantrums. She has always seemed reasonably happy to accept that things don't always go her way.

Well now its like she has all of a sudden become miss independent and will throw a tantrum at the slightest thing. For example she wanted to water the plants and threw a tantrum because she could not lift the watering can. I have tried to talk calmly to her and try to explain why she can't do/have things, I have tried putting her in a naughty corner, shutting her in her bedroom and ignoring her but nothing seems to work. I NEVER give in to her though as I don't want her to think that behaviour like that is going to be rewarded.

Does anyone have any suggestions of how I can deal with this and how long does it normally last?

Any suggestions welcome.

Thanks
Kristi

4 lovely munchkins DD 10/03, DD 03/05, DS 10/06 &

Sounds like typical 2 year old behaviour to me. All I can suggest for you is to pick one consequence (or one for at home and one for when you are out) and stick to using that. Get anyone else who deals with your daughter to do the same thing as well and hopefully she will get the idea and grow out of it. Emily started tantrums around 18 months and I just made sure I always dealt with them in the same way. I explain that Mummy doesn't like them, I know she is frustrated/angry/sad/etc but throwing tantrum will not fix it and she can go in her room until she is finished and then have a cuddle when she is ready. Now she puts herself in her room when she is losing it and will come up and ask for a cuddle when she is ready. I don't make her say sorry because the cuddle to me is the same thing. Sometimes I will go in if it sounds as though she is calm to talk to her and then we go and play but other times I just wait until she comes out. Emily still has bad days when everything sets her off - this often coincides with teething so I just use the same consequence if she has a tantrum but work harder at avoiding them.

Charlotte mum to Emily 27-08-03 & Lily 21-09-06

Hi Kristi

Lachie was/is exactly the same. Everyone kept saying wait until he's 2 and silly me thought - he's such a good boy, I'm sure we'll be OK. It seemed to happen overnight, not long after his second birthday he started throwing tantrums all the time over the smallest things. Like Charlotte said - the best way to deal with it is to be consistent. When we are at home - most of the "experts" say not to - but I put him in his bed. He knows the difference between sleep time and being in trouble. It can be hard though as they always know the "right" time to do it, like when you are in the middle of breastfeeding. If you decide on one way to deal with it and stick with it they do get the message - it doesn't stop the tantrums altogether but they do get a bit easier to manage (most of the time smile ). You are on the right track with not giving in - I remember Dr Phil saying you have to pick your battles and when you do make sure you NEVER lose. A lot of people have told me that they are worse when they turn 3 because they start backchatting. But I think at least when they are 3 you can reason with them a bit more. Lachie is pretty bright, but when he is having a tantrum there is absolutely no way he will listen to reason. Lachie has been going through this for 6 months now - I hope it doesn't last too much longer! But sometimes we can go a few days without one, then other days he seems to lose it every 10 mins! I know if I'm a bit stressed he gets worse, they do pick up on it.

Sorry to rave on for so long. I hope your girls are both well smile

Take care
Jas
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