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Who thinks tantrums are embarrassing?? Rss

Hi,

My DD has only just turned one and since then I am seeing a side to her that I can only describe as a little bit of devil. My sweet little baby who wouldn't carry on over too much of anything has now decided that there is certain things she wants to do and certain things she doesn't and god help us all if we happen to get it wrong. smile Its not really that bad but I know what you mean about embarrassing. So far there hasn't been any incidents in public but when she throws a wobbly at home all I can think to myself is thank god we aren't out in public. I am so scared of what is to come with the 'terrible twos' if this is what comes with the 'only ones'.

I agree with the no clear cut rules on how to deal with tantrums. I don't see the sense in smacking kiddies because generally they are so out of it freaking out that it seems to only make matters worse. I haven't really figured out how I am going to approach these situations as yet but if you come up with any good ideas I would love to hear them. smile

Take care.
Kaz

Karen, NSW, 1 baby girl

HI,

I agree, my 19 month old saw the wiggles big red car n hte shopping centre today and i thought she had been in hte pram for awhile i'll let her sit in it and have a play, but when it was time to go boy oh boy there was screaming, rolling around on the ground and throwing her drink bottle which she actually broke. I just ignored her and said no and then nothing. My friend was with me and has a 2 month old and she looked at me as if are you going to do something??? But what could i do there to young to disciplene RIGHT?????

IF anyone has some tips that would be great cause yes i was embarrassed to

Thanks
When my dd turmed 2 i found it amazing how much she changed the first time she had a tantrum in it shops it almost brought me to tears i just had to pick her up and carry her around and get what i had to get. I have found (working in a supermarket) that most people feel sorry for the parent more than anything. She is just about to turn 3 and things are getting better we don't have tantrums over everthing she is starting to understand that she will still get told off if she does something wrong. I found that sometimes just letting them sit for a bit to have thier tanty and when the are calmed down continue with what i was doing but also explain to them that they can't have everything their own way after a while they learn that it is not going to work. The worst thing to do would be to give in as next time they will remember and will just keep pushing till you give in if you stand firm to start with it will get eaiser as they get older and start to understand.

My girls have only ever thrown a few tantrums each in public. I treat them the same whether we are in public or private - I ignore them. Kids pick up on the fact that you act differently at the shops because you get embarrassed, but you have to realise that no matter what action you take (or don't take) half the people will agree with it and half won't.

My little one, who is 20 months now, went through a phase where she hated sitting in the trolley. I once did my whole grocery shop with her screaming. It was really embarassing, but I stuck to it - I even worked up the courage to tell off an old lady who went up to my daughter and started trying to pat her and calm her down (while glaring at me). I asked her to please not give my daughter the attention she was demanding as it was a short term solution, and the approach I was trying was a long-term solution.

I got that line from watching a friend whose 2 year old had a tantrum over lollies at the checkout. My friend was ignoring her son and the lady behind her told her that her child's screaming was really annoying the rest of the shoppers and she should pick him up and calm him down. My friend told the lady that clearly her son was annoying everyone, but most people would be smart enough to realise that yes, in the short-term her son was annoying people, but if she gave him whatever he wanted whenever he wanted just to shut him up, then he would be much more annoying in the long-term as an anti-social teenage criminal. She emphasised that most people were smart enough to figure this out.

Do whatever you feel is right. I wouldn't smack her though - my reason being that we used to smack our big one if she ran off in the shops. Now, if her little sister runs off, she'll chase her down and smack her and tell her off. This is really embarrassing. It's also pretty funny to watch, but it's hard to explain why you can smack and she can't.
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