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Not doing poos on the toilet Lock Rss

My 3 year old refuses to do poos on the toilet, she tells me she needs to do poos and brings me a nappy. Any tips on what to do would be most appreciated.

Stacey, WA, 3year & 6weeks

My daughter was exactly the same when she was 3. I phoned every information line, asked all my friends and worried about it all the time. She would go and get her own pull-up and even empty it into the toilet afterwards (often with alot of mess). Has hard as it sounds we just stopped talking about it, and thinking about it. This had been our main worry through a year of toilet training. We stopped pressuring her to go to the toilet. After a couple of weeks we were out at her grandparents and she did a poo on the toilet. We almost smothered her with hugs and praise and then had to follow thru with every bribe we had ever used ie. new barbie, m&m's. My advise is just completely stop talking about it give her the nappy and tell her when she is ready to do it on the toilet she can let you know. When she realises it doesn't effect and worry you any more and she isn't getting extra attention for it, it won't take long for her to go on the toilet . Good luck.
i have a four year old boy who has been bladder trained since he was 2 and dry by night since 2 &1/2 but he point blank refuses to poo on the toilet!he goes and gets a pull up then does it in there!we have tried not buying pullups but he just held it in for five days and we had to give in.i"ve tried bribery ,promises & praise but nothing has worked !any ideas?i'm just sick of people blaming me when this is beyond my control,and it must embarres him.he is a very happy,smart and well loved little boy -this is our only problem!

melissa,sydney,mum to jakob,4, & cameron,1

My 2.5 yr old is the same too,wont poo on the toilet, usually he does one first thing in the morning (like 6am) in his nappy or during his daytime nap when he wears a nappy. Offered rewards, tried putting him on the toilet in the middle of the day. He's seen us do it. So I don't know other than keep trying & hope for the best!

Kristina, Mum of James 3yrs & Matilda 14 months

I was so relieved to read this topic - I thought my daughter was one of very few that was like this. She has been toilet trained since she was 2 1/2 but refuses to do a poo on the toilet and she is nearly 4 1/2!!!! I have tried everything from star charts, rewards, bribery, ignoring her etc but nothing works. When I stopped buying her nappies she became really constipated and distressed after 3 days and I had to give in. She won't let anyone else see the pull-ups she uses and will wait until we are at home to do a poo rather than put a nappy on in front of other people. I've talked to other mothers, doctors, pre-school teachers and they all say "she will do it when she's ready" - they've been saying that for over a year!!! My fear is that she is still going to be doing it when she goes to school next year. My older daughter (9 now) was so different, completely toilet trained and night trained by 2 1/2 and I'm hoping the baby (19 mths) will be easy too. Has anybody else on this forum had this problem and since their posting solved it??? If so, how????

Leanne, NSW, 3 girls

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