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  5. Please help me! I am at my wits end... 2 year old wakes up to 10 times a night!

Please help me! I am at my wits end... 2 year old wakes up to 10 times a night! Lock Rss

Hi, I am the mum of a 22 month old boy, who will not sleep through the night. He was going really well until june when he got tonsillitis really badly. We used to be able to do the controlled crying and that worked. But not anymore.
He goes to bed now in a big bed quite well (he just learned how to climb out of his cot), and sleeps for about 1-2 hours before waking and calling for mum. I can go in there and he eventually settles, but this happens so frequently, that I am not getting any sleep.
I tried bringing him in to sleep with me and that might work 1 out of 7 nights, but he still wakes up. He is also a very restless sleeper. Even when he is asleep, he is constantly wriggling, kicking, talking, snoring and sometimes even having little dreams and crying in his sleep.
All of this makes for not much sleep for mum.
He will have a small bottle between 4-6 am and then he will sleep until 7.30 when he wakes up. This is the best bit of sleep i usually get. But most days I have to be up at 6.30am regardless to get ready for work and day care.
I am really desperate for some help.

KynansMum

Oh dear! Sounds like you need to set up a routine for your son. Take a look at Tizzie Hall's Save Our Sleep. This is a CC method, but works well if you stick to it. Another book to try that does NOT focus on the CC method is The No Cry Sleep Solution. I also have this book, but did not find it as effective.

I had to place my 9 month old at the time on this routine cos he would wake up 7-10 times per night, and it was driving me NUTS! Didnt help that I have PND, but thats another story!

Good luck, and it is really worth it checking out that book!

The No Cry Sleep Solution worked really well for us; but it isn't an instant fix and she says that in the book. She boasts a 96-98% success rate at 90 days. I tweaked a couple of things for Alex and he did his first stretch of 10 hours in we couldn't remember how long the first night. I borrowed my copy from the local library as I didn't want to go out and spend $40 on a book that may or may not work.

I know it's hard, before I read the book Alex was getting about 5 hours of very broken sleep in 24 and all the things that used to work like feeding/rocking/in our bed didn't work any more; funnily enough it was just after a bout of tonsillitis. So in all, it took about 2 months to "come right" from him getting sick to us having enough;he had slept through before (sleeping through is classed as 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep)but not in about 5 months before we read the book.

Do you think he's scared or has anything else major happened in the last few months developmentally?

I feel your pain, we had a rough night the other night with Alex where he was up and down all night, but settled in bed with us at about 3am (which he hasn't done for ages)and slept till nearly 7. Sometimes I find that if we aren't up to one, the other is up and sometimes it feels like we never sleep. LOL

So probably not helped, but you aren't alone and it does pass eventually but sometimes you just need a bit of help; and the best thing about advice is that you can take what you feel will work/feels right for you and ignore the rest.


Hi, have you mentioned this problem to your maternal nurse? Recently my 16month old daughter and I spent 3 days at a Melbourne sleep school(no cost) and it was great. Violet has improved so much and now sleeps 7.15-6.30ish uninterupted. Lack of sleep is pure torture, speak to your doctor or health nurse and ask for suggestions/help.

Good luck, Kylie

Mr Reed born 20/1/2010. Too cute smile

Sounds common to this age group. My James is 23 months and doing exactly the same thing except that when he gets up he won't resettle on his own. Either has to be in my bed or i have to sleep next to him. Prior to this he was sleeping about 12-13 hours unbroken sleep. It started happening about 2 months after he moved into his big bed. I've chatted with girlfriends with kids the same age and they're all having the same problem! There seems to be a resurge of separation anxiety as well. Unfortunately i haven't found a solution to our problem so we're still struggling but reassuring to know you're not on your own.
This might sound odd but is there good feng shui in your childs room? My ds for 8 weeks woke up screaming and not going back to sleep from midnight I changed his room to good feng shui and ever since he has slept from 7.30pm till after 6am without waking.

worth a look into.

My son Jaden is 16months, and we started a bad habit with him when he was 5months. We let him sleep in our bed and because he was sick I just rolled over and gave him boob every time he cried. One year later and he was still in our bed waking every 1-2hours. I tried settling him, walking and patting him but he just wanted to comfort feed, and due to a lack of sleep, we just gave in and let him sleep feed every time he woke up, sometimes up to 10 times a night. We decided we wanted another baby, so last night we put him in his own cot in his own room. Set up a routine where we bath, read a story, breastfeed him and put him in his cot at 8.30pm. My husband goes in every 10mins if he's crying for 5mins and leaves again. We decided it would be worst for him to see mummy and not get a feed. It was easier than I thought it would be and long story short, although it is only the second night I feel optimistic about it all.

hi i have a 3 and a half yr old who still wakes up at least 5 times a nite and cries and hits the wall it drives me crazy she ends up in our bed... i have a 9 month old she sleeps rite thru the nite yay lol
oh i know how you feel! and i cant tell you how excited i am to find someone in the same boat as me!!

my daughter is 24 months. still breastfeeding, still cosleeping. she actually used to be a great sleeper for a newborn, bed @ 930. wake at 130. 430. 730 then up at 930. then from about 9 days old she slept 930, til 330. then over the next few weeks it built up to her going 930, til 530am then back to sleep til 930. it was GREAT!!

but silly me. i ALWAYS. i mean ALWAYS breastfed her to sleep. i remember sometimes she was soo tired and crying and so i just put the boob in her mouth. sometimes she would refuse it outright. but i was soo clueless i thought, she needs boobie she just doesnt realise it!! so i would just keep trying til she accepted it and went to sleep. i know how bad that sounds! i didnt realise that what she really wanted was to be put into her bed and to SLEEP.

another mistake i made was never taking her to her room. i would just feed her on the couch in front of the tv til she fell asleep. cos of this i never knew how often she fed, cause she was just always on the boob, as food, as comfort, as anything!

at about 3 months old she got too big for her basinette so i tried putting her into the cot. at the same time she got sick and had gotten needles just prior. so she was obviously upset. she went back to waking up @ 430. then 330. then 130. i freaked. eep im doing something wrong. of course now i know she was going thru a growth spurt plus she had been sick and on top of all that she had to get used to a new bed. i should have persised. instead i brung her into bed with me, so i could get some sleep.

i was a single mum, 17 and living at home with my parents. so i didnt have any other things to do. no housework. no partner to have couple time with etc. so to be honest, cosleeping sorta suited me. i didnt have to get up and she went back to sleep sooo quickly. by this time i had mastered feeding laying down so it became very convenient.

fast forward a few months and i met my current partner dean. it was long distance at first so the cosleeping still suited. except her sleeping was getting worse.. on the boob a lot etc. it got to the point where i couldnt roll over cause she would wake up!

i was soo paranoid about her even whimpering that i just panicked and gave her the boob.

now, at 2 years old she has still got this habbit but much much much worse. now i live in a different state with my partner, i have a house to run etc and im just DYING for some personal time, some space.

she can take hours to settle at night, of course always going to sleep on the breast. and staying that way ALL night. rolling over? nup, cant do that. she sleeps ontop of me, horizontally on the boob. very uncomfortable. i dont get sleep. my partner always goes to sleep in the spare bed as she is kicking him all night and he has to get up at 530 for work.

ive tried her in her bed. i last til 1am, sometimes 3. but i can never make it longer than that. she will wake up every 40 minutes, at least. if not more sometimes. of course, only going back to sleep with the boob. and it takes about an hr and a half before i can get her off it and go back to my own bed where i dont sleep cause i lay there knowing she will wake up any minute.

my relationship is suffering i have pnd which is getting worse and worse every day.

i have no family nearby that can help. i havent made friends here. and my partner works a lot and at bad hours so he cant help out.

i dont wanna do controlled crying i know its not something i could stick with. there is a sleep centre i rang but i have no way of getting there, its about 40 mins drive away from me. they did give me some hints that so far havent worked.

i have bought the no cry sleep solution for toddlers, ive read about 100 pages. i cant find the time!! i know i have to find time to finish it but how... my daughter sleeps 30 mins without me during the day. the rest of the time she is with me 24.7 she is unhappy from not getting enough rest. while she is a happy and very loving child she is also short tempered and throws at least 20 tantrums a day. i know its cause im stressed from all of this and she isnt getting enough sleep.

i dont think i can cope anymore, my partner doesnt quite understand and thats why im so happy to have found there are other people out there like me who are having trouble with this.. after 2 years i just need space. time out. i need it my daughter needs it my relationship needs it.. i just dunno where to start!

im sorry i couldnt offer any advice but thanks so much for giving me a chance to share some of my story. its given me perspective, i know i need to fix things.

i wish you a lot of luck in solving this and if you get any good advice that works please share it!!
its gr8 2 hear bak from u! That all sounds like my life, larissa is sleeping in our bed now and i have to sleep in hers. me and my hubby found it hard when she was a baby coz she had colic reflux and wasn't much of a sleeper. she was in a bassinette and i think we tried the cot but it took prob 3 months for her to get used to it! then she got bronchulitis and was really unsettled so my husband said put her in our bed well wasn't that the worst thing he said and did so now at 3 and a half she cant sleep alone ive tried sleep school and the controled crying thing but she just vomited from crying and getting so upset. i even tried it the other nite and she vomitted! so now i think it will be in her own time to decide when she no longer needs some1 beside her to go to sleep. Lol hopefully soon. my 9 month old girl is an amazing sleeper and hasn't seen our bed yet lol. not making the same mistake twice. so i guess for future dont allow kids in the bed with u. and i aslo used to give larissa a bottle to go off to sleep with she only cut that out when she turned 3 was so bloody hard!!! keep in touch xx
I have a 3yo and 5yo, both who are not very good sleepers so I completely understand the feeling of exhaustion. Just remember that IT WILL NOT BE LIKE THIS FOREVER!! Maybe a new routine will help, maybe being more firm will help, maybe you've made a rod for your back, maybe maybe maybe... My view is that your child probably just needs you right now, they need your reasurrance, they need to know that you are still there at night, they need cuddles etc. Listen to your child, pay close attention to his behaviour, cuddle him when he asks, don't get cross when he wakes and reassure him and give him what he needs. IT WILL PASS, even if it doesn't feel like it right now. By the time he is a teenager you won't be able to get him out of bed!!!
This post was probably from a long time ago but hoping you get this message.

My son is 22 months. He’s never been a good sleeper. We have been to Karitane gor reaidential stays 4 times, we have done allergy tests, we have strict routines, we have tried cry it out, no crying methods and nothing works.

Because of this we bought him a king single 8 weeks ago and my husband and I take turns sleeping with him once he wakes through the night. But even when we are with him he tosses, turns and cries out ALL NIGHT.

Did anyone who’s toddler did he same thing ever find a reason or did it ever get better?

It’s been nearly two years of this and I’m currently 18 weeks pregnant and so down about it all.

Any advice would be much appreciated. Thanks.
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