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Hi All,

Was looking for some advice or to see if people have been in similar situations. I made the mistake of allowing my DD to sleep in my bed with me (her father and I have split). Since moving house though I took this as an opportunity to have the rule that she sleeps in her own bed in her own room. All was fine for the first couple of weeks but then she started waking and crying until I go and lay down in her bed. It is most frustrating.

Is there any suggestions as to how I can stop this? Another mistake I have made is allowing her to watch tv in the lounge room until she falls asleep. So that is where she goes to sleep of a night and then I put her to bed. I know I probably have to have a set bedtime and send her to bed.

You sound very similar to me! My daughter is supposed to sleep in a cot, but there is a single bed in her room. I am supposed to lie on the single bed with her until she falls asleep and then move her into her bed. If she wakes during the night then she wants to get into the single bed with me. Right now, I just give in to her because it is easier than fighting her in the middle of the night when I'm tired, but as soon as I'm finished my next assignment then I'm working on it!

What I think might work for us is, if I tell her that she has to go in her cot, but that I will stay in the room until she falls asleep. Same with when she wakes in the night ... I will tell her that she must stay in her cot, but I will wait with her until she is ready to go back to sleep. I think the hard part will be to get her to stay in her own bed at all ... when that part is mastered I think she will be okay to sleep right through the night again.

Unfortunately for us, I have to lie down with her for daytime sleeps as well (not sure if you do this) and she will probably get confused if I won't lie down at night but I will during the day. But she is not in a good routine with her daytime sleeps due to going to daycare some of the time but not every day, so she gets confused about what time she should sleep and where she is.

Oh well, I guess we just have to hang in there and see what works!
Thanks ladies. And Izzys Mum, you are right, it's too easy to give in the middle of the night because you are tired and don't want to fight. My DD is out of a cot now so if I don't go in to her she will come to me. DD hasn't had a daytime sleep since she was 2 so that isn't an issue for me. She will only sleep if we are in the car travelling.

Thanks 3littlemen. I definitely think I need to set some strong rules for bedtime and go through a few hard nights to start seeing improvement.

Hi there,

Oh I am eagerly awaiting what answers you get for this one. While my husband and I have not split like yourself & your partner, I have also made the mistake of letting my daughter sleep in our bed & she also falls asleep in front of the telly at night. Bad I know....

To add to it now, I am working till midnight 4 nights a week..... I am either in my bed with her when I get home, or in my bed with her. Grrr...... Hubby gets up early and is in bed early therefore does whatever is easy for him to do at night rather than try to set a routine. What to do????

Cheers
Racheal. smile





I've always been a bit of a sleep *** and although it worked like a charm with my baby girl (1 year) it was and still often is a long hard struggle with my 4 year old. both my kids have an absolutely unwavering bedtime and pre bed routine.

baby - dinner 5pm bath 5.30 bed 6pm
4 yr - bath 5pm dinner 5.30 bed 6.30

my hubby and I divide and conquer for this to make it happen. my girl is no problem at all so i won't talk about her. I have found with my son that he was happy to go down without assistance at night if we had a solid routine and an earlier bed time than I would have expected and absolutely no TV.

I start the bed routine at 6pm for him - loo, teeth and a story and then we turn out the light and briefly discuss the day and what will happen tomorrow. then i draw a pattern on his tummy and make up a silly little story, we call it a tickle picture, then we kiss good night and I say if he goes to sleep without calling out then I will come back to give him a special frog kiss. I was given this technique by a sleep consultant. she said ask him to choose a frog kiss or a monkey hug. tell him you will only come back to give this special hug or kiss when he's asleep. it's to reassure him that he doesn't need to call out and check in on you, that you will check in on him. then you commit to going in to him 3 times or so before you go to bed and providing your child does submit and go to sleep then you make the kiss or hug bold enough to elicit a drowsy response like a sigh or a movement. the idea is that you checking in on them marks on their subconscious that you've ben there. these special hugs/kisses only come to kids who are asleep. for us this worked wonders after 3 nights and although we go through periods of wakefulness a star chart is a great back up and works a treat for us.

I feel that a firm loving routine for bed is the only way to make them feel the reassurance they crave. although i think sitting in the room with them is one strategy there should always be an exit strategy. try reading the techniques in the book called toddler taming by christopher green. worth a read.

hope that helps

If you fancy a laugh, visit my blog which is basically a collection of observations and rantings about motherhood, people and the mundane. See www.callmepicky.blogspot.com.au

I've always been a bit of a sleep *** and although it worked like a charm with my baby girl (1 year) it was and still often is a long hard struggle with my 4 year old. both my kids have an absolutely unwavering bedtime and pre bed routine.

baby - dinner 5pm bath 5.30 bed 6pm
4 yr - bath 5pm dinner 5.30 bed 6.30

my hubby and I divide and conquer for this to make it happen. my girl is no problem at all so i won't talk about her. I have found with my son that he was happy to go down without assistance at night if we had a solid routine and an earlier bed time than I would have expected and absolutely no TV.

I start the bed routine at 6pm for him - loo, teeth and a story and then we turn out the light and briefly discuss the day and what will happen tomorrow. then i draw a pattern on his tummy and make up a silly little story, we call it a tickle picture, then we kiss good night and I say if he goes to sleep without calling out then I will come back to give him a special frog kiss. I was given this technique by a sleep consultant. she said ask him to choose a frog kiss or a monkey hug. tell him you will only come back to give this special hug or kiss when he's asleep. it's to reassure him that he doesn't need to call out and check in on you, that you will check in on him. then you commit to going in to him 3 times or so before you go to bed and providing your child does submit and go to sleep then you make the kiss or hug bold enough to elicit a drowsy response like a sigh or a movement. the idea is that you checking in on them marks on their subconscious that you've ben there. these special hugs/kisses only come to kids who are asleep. for us this worked wonders after 3 nights and although we go through periods of wakefulness a star chart is a great back up and works a treat for us.

I feel that a firm loving routine for bed is the only way to make them feel the reassurance they crave. although i think sitting in the room with them is one strategy there should always be an exit strategy. try reading the techniques in the book called toddler taming by christopher green. worth a read.

hope that helps

If you fancy a laugh, visit my blog which is basically a collection of observations and rantings about motherhood, people and the mundane. See www.callmepicky.blogspot.com.au

I've always been a bit of a sleep *** and although it worked like a charm with my baby girl (1 year) it was and still often is a long hard struggle with my 4 year old. both my kids have an absolutely unwavering bedtime and pre bed routine.

baby - dinner 5pm bath 5.30 bed 6pm
4 yr - bath 5pm dinner 5.30 bed 6.30

my hubby and I divide and conquer for this to make it happen. my girl is no problem at all so i won't talk about her. I have found with my son that he was happy to go down without assistance at night if we had a solid routine and an earlier bed time than I would have expected and absolutely no TV.

I start the bed routine at 6pm for him - loo, teeth and a story and then we turn out the light and briefly discuss the day and what will happen tomorrow. then i draw a pattern on his tummy and make up a silly little story, we call it a tickle picture, then we kiss good night and I say if he goes to sleep without calling out then I will come back to give him a special frog kiss. I was given this technique by a sleep consultant. she said ask him to choose a frog kiss or a monkey hug. tell him you will only come back to give this special hug or kiss when he's asleep. it's to reassure him that he doesn't need to call out and check in on you, that you will check in on him. then you commit to going in to him 3 times or so before you go to bed and providing your child does submit and go to sleep then you make the kiss or hug bold enough to elicit a drowsy response like a sigh or a movement. the idea is that you checking in on them marks on their subconscious that you've ben there. these special hugs/kisses only come to kids who are asleep. for us this worked wonders after 3 nights and although we go through periods of wakefulness a star chart is a great back up and works a treat for us.

I feel that a firm loving routine for bed is the only way to make them feel the reassurance they crave. although i think sitting in the room with them is one strategy there should always be an exit strategy. try reading the techniques in the book called toddler taming by christopher green. worth a read.

hope that helps

If you fancy a laugh, visit my blog which is basically a collection of observations and rantings about motherhood, people and the mundane. See www.callmepicky.blogspot.com.au

I've always been a bit of a sleep *** and although it worked like a charm with my baby girl (1 year) it was and still often is a long hard struggle with my 4 year old. both my kids have an absolutely unwavering bedtime and pre bed routine.

baby - dinner 5pm bath 5.30 bed 6pm
4 yr - bath 5pm dinner 5.30 bed 6.30

my hubby and I divide and conquer for this to make it happen. my girl is no problem at all so i won't talk about her. I have found with my son that he was happy to go down without assistance at night if we had a solid routine and an earlier bed time than I would have expected and absolutely no TV.

I start the bed routine at 6pm for him - loo, teeth and a story and then we turn out the light and briefly discuss the day and what will happen tomorrow. then i draw a pattern on his tummy and make up a silly little story, we call it a tickle picture, then we kiss good night and I say if he goes to sleep without calling out then I will come back to give him a special frog kiss. I was given this technique by a sleep consultant. she said ask him to choose a frog kiss or a monkey hug. tell him you will only come back to give this special hug or kiss when he's asleep. it's to reassure him that he doesn't need to call out and check in on you, that you will check in on him. then you commit to going in to him 3 times or so before you go to bed and providing your child does submit and go to sleep then you make the kiss or hug bold enough to elicit a drowsy response like a sigh or a movement. the idea is that you checking in on them marks on their subconscious that you've ben there. these special hugs/kisses only come to kids who are asleep. for us this worked wonders after 3 nights and although we go through periods of wakefulness a star chart is a great back up and works a treat for us.

I feel that a firm loving routine for bed is the only way to make them feel the reassurance they crave. although i think sitting in the room with them is one strategy there should always be an exit strategy. try reading the techniques in the book called toddler taming by christopher green. worth a read.

hope that helps

If you fancy a laugh, visit my blog which is basically a collection of observations and rantings about motherhood, people and the mundane. See www.callmepicky.blogspot.com.au

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