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temper tantrums! Lock Rss

Hi I could really use some help with this one!! My 14 month old has just started public tantrums. He has done it twice now it is very well for people to say don't go shopping but it has to be done! Both times I ended up giving him the dummy even though he has not had it for day time for 2 months I just didn't know what else to do and it worked ...BUT it is probably not ideally what I wanted to do. I have had friends say just leave and he will learn not to do it but he is pretty young and a touch behind as far as development goes and I honestly don't think he would understand. Am I wrong? Any ideas or thoughts or anything would be helpful. e.g. should I just give him the dummy if it makes him happy even though I personally feel he is too old for it? who knows?! this mother thing get's harder the older they get!!

Kelly,QLD, boy 23.01.03 and girl 08.04.05

Hi Kelly,

Is there some way you can prepare something to entertain him. Maybe a sandwhich or some other kind of food. My daughter use to get to the shops and say banana, before we got out of the car, as she always had a banana to chomp on whilst in the trolley.

Otherwise if food doesn't do it, does he have a toy that may help.

Or, just another thought, i use to give my daughter grocery items to look at, eg. the pasta packets, lots of good noise!

I wouldn't want to give into the dummy, but you gotta do, what you gotta do. wink

I hope something out of this might help,


DD5, DS3, DS lost to SIDS at 6mths & DD6m

Hi Kelly,
My 14 month old daughter has started to do the same. I find if I keep her attention occupied with grocery items, plastic spoons, the shopping bag, food or such, that she doesn't have a tantrum.

It's when she sees someting she wants and can't have that she starts. Or if she is walking and we pass one of those cars, etc that you put money in and she sees other kids on it.

Hi Kelly,

I saw a TV show with the Baby Whisperer where a toddler threw the mother of all tantrums every time mother went shopping.. She cried the WHOLE time and the poor mother was just embarrassed and exhausted..

The Baby Whisperer accompanied the mother on one of her shopping trips and witnessed the toddler tantrumming and helped the mother to teach the toddler that this behaviour is not on...

What she did was everytime the toddler cried (in the trolley) she took her out, put her down on the floor and waited till she stopped crying.. the toddler would climb all over her wanting mum to pick her up but mum just held her and let her cry.. Only when she stopped crying did mum pick her up, cuddle her and put her back into the trolley..

It took about 5 or 6 tantrums before the toddler realised she was gonna get cuddles and praise from mum only when she stopped crying.

The very next time mother went shopping with the toddler there was not one tantrum.. the mother was so shocked!

I hope this works for you.. I know it is hard to put your child down on the floor of the shopping centre(maybe take a blanket with you to put toddler on) and let her scream in front of other shoppers, but the baby Whisperer reckons.. who cares, as you are teaching your child better behaviour.

Good Luck!

Brodie's mama, NT

go shopping with someone else if you can. even an older child and as soon as he cracks a tantrum put him back in the car with someone else (if you are on your own i wouldn't do it but if you can take someone else a few times when you go shopping) then he aint being rewarded for cracking the tantrum he aint getting his own way and it will stop. or give him something to eat or play with or a bottle or something when you go in there. a distraction.

Narelle, Eilish 5th june 2002 TTC since dec 2002

Hi wow am I stupid!! He is fine when I do the groceries and we basically do the something to eat and groceries to play with it's when I do the banking bill paying and then get distracted and go window shopping that we have problems and a very nice friend pointed out to me that it was actually unreasonable to expect a 14 month old to sit still and quietly in a pram for in excess of two hours. And you know what?... This honestly had not occurred to me!!!

Kelly,QLD, boy 23.01.03 and girl 08.04.05

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