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To have three or not? When? Lock Rss

We have two beautiful children - a girl 3 1/2 yrs and a boy 15 months. The idea of a third child is playing on our minds. Neither my DH nor myself are particularly for or against the idea. We can both see pretty equal reasons why we should and why we shouldn't have a third. However, it's something I'd like to decide on sooner rather than later. It would be easier to decide if one of us really wanted to or really didn't want to have a third. I'd love to hear from anyone who has three children. What are your thoughts? Was it easier to have the third than the first and second? Is it really hard juggling three children? If we have a third it will be in the next 12 months or so. My girl would be about 5 and my boy would be about 2 1/2 yrs. My girl would be in pre-school 3 days a week and my boy would spend one day a week with grandparents.

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Hi Kb,
I have 3 healthy happy and very active little boy's.
I fell pregnant with my second one when my 1st had his 1st bday and then we decided we wanted another and my second little boy was 2 when baby 3 arrived.
I have never regreted having them so close together and yes you are a lot busier but it depends on how the other children react when baby 3 comes home.
In your case it should be a bit easier with your aged kids at least they will be alot more independant and in preschool for 3 days which makes a huge difference having one less for the day.
I had all 3 on my own day in and day out while DH was at work but I have a fantastic mum who helped me out in the beggining when bubby was a newborn.
You sound like you really don't want another baby due to yucky pregnancies and your figure changing, if you really wanted another baby none of this would matter I think.
I hope you make the right decision on what to do if you house and job is going to make it all too hard then I would not even bother as it will only add more stress to your busy life already.

Hi kb
I have a 7 year old and 2 1/2 year old twins. We did ony plan on two but someone had another little 'surprise' for us. I had always wanted 3 but i did agree that 2 would be amples for us. When i was having twins, my hubby said that i always seem to have a way to get my own way!!!A lot of people always say about having another one to even it up, i always say no as i might have triplets!!!!! I dont have a problem at all with the three-i think it is beautiful. I Think you just cope with whatever you have. If someone told me that i would have twins, i would have thought oh my god! But i have coped-soo far.

Kylie, NSW, 7year od and 2 year old twins

I have just had my third and the transition is harder than what it was from 1 to 2. Not umbearable but not as easy. its bc the older kids have each other to get into things together and hurt each other while im with the bub. I am 3 weeks post c-section and I am nearly back to my pre weight as i havnt stopped! (not pre shape). The kids are ransacking the lounge while I am here.

The theory is that if there is a hudge gap between the 2nd and 3rd that there is middle child syndrom as the older gets the attention as they do everything first, then the second gets nothing and the third is the baby and always get treated as the baby. This oculd potentially happen to us as we have 2 boys then a girl.

We may not have a forth, but I figure if we dont that as long sa you are aware of the issues that you can correct it before it happens

3 under 3- 15 month gaps. Busy but loving it eìí?

We have 3. Two of our own and a niece that is being raised as ours. Dispite the stress we go though with the youngest (neice) I love having 3. We always wanted 3 and they all get along well. I would dearly love to carry another one, due to us always planning for a third. I kind of had my heart and body always prepared for 3 of my own. I don't feel complete yet, I still feel as though someone is missing. I do come from a family of 6, and I'm the second eldest. My sister and I hated each other growing up (we were six years apart) but we are really close now, the whole 6 of us are very close. I couldn't imagine life without them. Mum and Dad coped, sure we missed out on things but we never suffered for it. Dad was a railway worker and they didn't earn much when I was a kid. My Hubby also thinks alot about money only because he wants our kids to have the best as I do. I don't think there is anything wrong with that but I don't want to look back in 10 years time and still have this empty feeling inside. By the way he made it very clear to me tonight his feeling about another one, so I had just better hope one time the condon breaks in the next year or so.
I say follow your heart if the wallet can keep up.

countrygirl

I am a mother to three beautiful children.
I had the same problem when deciding to have three, I always said I would only have two but I always saw myself with two girls. My first was a princess and four years later we had a darling boy (not quite the gap I wanted but circumstances did not allow for a smaller gap). Then 3years and 9months later another princess. DH always wanted 3 he is the middle child of three I am the eldest of two. I felt it was easier from 1 to 2 than 2 to 3, my eldest daughter is soooo good that I sometimes feel she doesn't get as much of my time because of the baby demanding my time and my DS being so demanding on me as well.
My children started kindy the year I had the next child so i had periods of only the two of us (mother and baby).
I was concerned about finances and middle child syndrome but as long as you have enough love to go around then it doesn't matter that they don't have the most up-to-date toys or clothes. "All you need is LOVE" (and food and shelter and warmth).
I am lucky though my sister has two children the same age as my oldest two but the opposite sex so my youngest two get their hand-me-downs and boy does DS love wearing his big cousins old clothes.

My decision to have a third came when my uncle died. My Dad is the youngest of three and lost his parents when he was in his twenties (at separate times) but to still have a sister even though it is now just the two of them made me think about if something happened to us. At times I do get a little stressed about finances but I can't imagine life without our little Aly belly.
Sorry I know I ramble but I don't get on that often and I feel I have a lot to say..
One thing I will mention with three children there is always conversation, the only time it is quiet is 8pm when they are all tucked in bed (DH included) other wise you constantly have a hum of noise going on, which we love.........

"jill of all trades"

well ihave 3 and i found 2 were hard my eldest is 7 yrs old but no longer in my custody i think u have to really be prepared for a 2nd or a 3rd kids are hard as we all know i would suggest that u weigh up the pros and cons of a third u are lucky u have one of each sex the 2 that i have custody of are both boys so like i said weigh up the pros n cos and go from there

angels sit upon shoulders when u feel all alone

we have 3 sons all close in age the age diff from no1 - no3 is 2.5 years so yes we were quite crazy with 3 under 3 the 'baby' stage was much easier than now at 6 almost 5 & nearly 4 the main difficulty was squeezing 3 car seats in the back of the car our boys as babies were quite 'easy' but its a different story now all pigheaded & so stubborn. still waiting for the time when they will stop fighting etc with your childeren beeing older i would go for it if i were you. i actuaaly like having 3 kids and read recently that 3 is the new 2. and i belive that a lot of or ffriends are having or have had no3 wishing you all the best and hope that you come to a decision soon

mum of 3 boys aged 11, 13 and 14

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