Huggies Forum

I just dont understand !! Lock Rss

your in laws just plain and simply need a bloody bullet Mary !!

they dont come from plante "we hate you " they come from planet idiot !! lol lol lol.....

nope ..your are the sort that need no explaining honey !! lol lol
It's okay Luke's Mum was just feeling pretty emotional! we have decided to move out! maybe then I can have a better relationship but she really just likes to intefere in stuff and she has this man friend and he buys her heaps of stuff and takes her out and she watches his sky etc and then tells everyone he's a bastard and she's just using him 100%.
Posted by: dakotagrace
It's okay Luke's Mum was just feeling pretty emotional! we have decided to move out! maybe then I can have a better relationship but she really just likes to intefere in stuff and she has this man friend and he buys her heaps of stuff and takes her out and she watches his sky etc and then tells everyone he's a **** and she's just using him 100%.
oh god .....your talking to the emotional queen here !! lol lol lol ...I get high emotions dont worrie !! lol lol lol...I honestly wasnt directing this at you ..sorry you felt like this ..I just see some woman get all bent out of shape over the most trivial of things !!

hope you find somewhere to live soon so you can get on with things ...bet it feels like everything would be on hold while your there ??
Posted by: lukes*mum
your in laws just plain and simply need a bloody bullet Mary !!

they dont come from plante "we hate you " they come from planet idiot !! lol lol lol.....

nope ..your are the sort that need no explaining honey !! lol lol


I think you might be right there mate, planet idiot is definitely more likely, lol. It's been all roses here since I started ignoring their phone calls!!

I'll still let them see the kids and DF obviously, but as far as myself is concerned, they don't exist.

You're one of the blessed Frankie, your MIL sounds lovely, but like you said, I'm sure she has her moments. Luckily, you're big enough to let those moments slide.
Sorry haven't read all the replies to this - actually I have read none but I just wanted to say I totally agree with you Franky.

I love my MIL - she is an amazing woman and I can truely say she is one of my best friends.

However if some other woman had ended up marrying my husband I am sure they would not have a very good relationship with my MIL. You see she does state her opinion on everything, she calls me when she thinks/knows things aren't going well in our relationship and gives me a rev up, she ignores what I ask her to do with our kids and spoils them rotten and my DH often tells her plans for the future and forgets to tell me. None of this bothers me though.

I am not a controlling person and I have learnt that my MIL (like most mens' mothers) just want the best for thier child and are honestly concerned for them and their families. My MIL spoils her grandkids but that is what grandparents are for. Yes she sometimes gives an opinion when its not wanted but that is all it is "an opinion". I can take it or leave it.

I hope that in the future my sons end up with women who do not see me as competiton or a threat but as a concerned mum who would walk on broken glass if it meant they were happy and safe.

I am glad I have given my MIL the benifit of doubt and now have an amazing woman in my life to share in my childrens lives and our life.
I tried and tried wiht my MIL she just didn't want to know me. I sent pics of the kids sent her letters cards the whole thing. In the end she told me not to bother.

Also she hated her own son so when he was sucidal and really ill with depression she told him to kill himself.

I never had my back up and was hoping for a wonderful big family. His family suck though.lol

Mum to 5 amazing gifts from God. 3 girls 2 boys

when i met my hubby he was ready to never speak to his parents again. they were disrespectful, cruel and mean. but i encouraged him to patch up their relationship, which he kind of did.
now we have their grandkids they are still the same. i am polite to them and would never stop them seeing the boys. MIL has told me i am fat (ok, i am!), have crap hair (no, i have NICE hair) and is generally insensitive to me (but i just ignore it).
we moved states (not because of them) and we are going up there in a week, and she isnt sure if we can stay with her. but yet they say how much they love the kids. she never even came to see DS1 on his 1st b'day. we paid for her to come down and see the boys (drove 2 hours each way to pick her up at the airport and drop her off again, and we only have one income). they are not rich, but have enough money to be VERY comfortable. i have bought a high chair and portacot for their house.
i understand that all families are different. i just feel sorry for hubby and the kids who dont get to see them but not because of me.
some people out there are just nasty and dont give a crap about others (her MIL has just come out of hospital with pnemonia and they dont even help her out).
i will never abuse or fight with my MIL, but i also will never care much about someone who doesnt care for me or my kids. i would rather use my energy on my kids, not a failed relationship.

hmmmm lukes*mum you want mine?
This looks like the perfect thread to seek advice on inlaws. For the past 4 years since our daughters birth I have not had a good relationship with my inlaws. Fil & BIL don't like me because I have taken their "mate" DP used to be their lacky running errands & doing so much for his dad & bro & in their eyes I have taken him away from them.
They smoke inside (BIL smokes more than ciggies) which is why I refuse to take my kids over there. they live only 5mins away & never call in to see our kids or DP. He still goes to visit them. Oh & FIL is the kind of guy that thinks all women belong barefoot & pregnant in a kitchen IYKWIM.
I refused to ivite them to my sons 1st birthday as I thought they never take the time to visit or call to see how our kids are so what was the point in me inviting them when they clearly couldn't care less.
I have tried & tried with MIL. She never calls it is always me calling her to see how she is & when I let her know what the kids are up to like "Oh DS took his first steps" etc she cuts me off & starts talking about her "Oh you'll never guess what I have been doing!"
The night before DS 1st birthday she cried on the phone to my mum saying she wanted to be included more in our lives. So I called more & organised dinners etc & everytime I organised anything she would say Sorry I have this or that to do & wouldn't make alternative arrangements. I finally gave up. It became to much & I was left feeling bad. She only pops in if she is going to or coming from a friends.
I have told myself for 4 years that they are just different & to deal with it.
SIL lives in QLD & when we took a family holiday there last October she came from Brissie to GC to spend time with us at the resort. We stayed on GC for 5 nights She arrived on the 2nd night & went to theme parks with us. She expected DP to go off with her & not worry about me or the kids. They went on all the bigger rides together whilst I took the kids to the kiddy rides then we met up for lunch. She ended up going home earlier than expected because she didn't get her own way. We were meant to stay with her in Brissie for 3 days but I decided to go see my BFF who moved to Brissie a year before. She has 2 lil girls & our DP's had a few beers so we stayed there the night. Well 1 night turned into 2 because SIL sent a message saying she was going to a comedy night & didn't want to stuff the kids & I around. I think she expected DP to go to Yeronga from Narangba without us.
We all stayed at my friends then we headed to SIL's on the third day. She was majorly peed.
I hadn't heard from her since our holiday. Then received a message on facebook saying how I didn't include her or talk to her alot & that she had taken time off work to spend with us & I made her feel guilty for wanting to spend time alone with her brother.
I replied saying it was a family holiday not just for her & DP to spend alone. & that I had more people to think about other than just her & that my kids came first before me trying to include or talk to her. She accused me of blaming the kids & didn't want to talk to me again. So she has made her decision of me based on a 3 day stressfull, full on holiday. Which I think is a little immature.
She came home for Christmas & I saw her for 10 mins on Christmas day. We were meant to have lunch with MIL on Boxing day & DP took the kids whilst I stayed home as I thought they would have a less stressful time without me there.

I feel these people make me feel stressed & unhappy so My new years resolution is to stay away from them. I feel I am happier without them in my life I would never ask DP to not see them or keep the kids from them I just DO NOT want them around me!

After reading this thread by Lukes mum, it makes me think maybe I am being a bit harsh & I might need to just keep fogiving & forgeting. What do u all think???


Elailah*Andy*Krystal i hear ya smile

than you keep forgiving and forgetting and than the next minute they are walking all over you!! thinking they can do it over and over and over again...
I think the one thing that I wish for with my IL's is they will take more interest in their grandson. They haven't seen him for a year and he doesn't have a clue who they are. DS is 2 and he thinks my parents and IL's are the same people. As my parents take more of an interest in him.
Sure I don't agree with the IL's parenting style but I push through all of that just to make them see how important their grandson should be to them.

I just remember at the end of the day they are my DH's parents and DS' grandparents, and I would never want someone to stop me seeing my parents so I just build a bridge and get over it.
Sorry that turned out to be really long smile
It is a very touchy subject with me & when I get started well thats what happens sorry.
I just find myself stressing & not wanting to see them because I know what happens when I do, so I would prefer DP & kids go without me. What makes it worse is when we are with extended family they act like the perfect grandparents When they are far from it.

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