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  5. Why do old people care so much ??

Why do old people care so much ?? Lock Rss

Just read that you said your friend was tiny, my friend was probably my size before I lost all my weight? So not exactly small - size 14/16.

How time flies!!

My mum had all 4 of us by emergency c-section. All for different reasons, but with me it was because I was a 9 pounder and I got stuck. I'm the 3rd child and the only one that she even had a labour with, but she just couldn't push me out, so back to theatre it was for her. I do actually believe that some woman CANNOT birth naturally no matter what, but as long as that baby comes out safe and sound it shouldn't make a difference how it happened.

Oh and just for the record, both my parents are British.

I had to have a c-section since my pelvis was small and bub head was too big. I tried to push him out and i was in labour for 2 days and i was begging for him to be born. I will have another c-section cause there's no way in this world am i going threw all that again and getting told that i should of had 1 in the first place.
Tell your friend to tell her MIL to keep her comments to her self and she has a new grand child and who cares how the baby was born.




My DS1 was born by emergency caeser, he just would not come down and then his heart rate started dropping so i was rushed to theatre, with DS2 I had an elective caeser, i had people asking me why i was choosing to have a caeser and I said because i want to (coulnt be bothered going into it with total strangers)

This is the way i see it, my body grew my babies and my body was their home for 9 months, even though they came out of my tummy my body still gave birth to them ,they didnt appear out of no where, I within myself have never felt bad about having caesers because i remember what I have just said and feel lucky to have kids no matter how they were born.

Sorry that your friend had to hear crap from her MIL.

I had 3 c-sections, and each time was a little disappointed - right up until I was cuddling my beautiful babies. The way I thought about it, was that when you think of how many more staff are involved in a c/s than a natural birth, there is no way that the doctors would suggest that if they really didn't consider it necessary.

I hope your friend can move past this, and enjoy her new baby.
It's not only old people-I have heard many younger woman carry on like they know someone elses birth better-simply because 'we should all be able to birth naturally bla frikking bla'.
It is unfortunate when you have a c section that not only do you have to come to terms with your own doubts/disapointments/demons, let alone every other know it all's opinion out there.
Remind her her MIL is not a doctor/nurse, she was not there, she does not need to make decisions daily based on what is best for a baby/mother, so her opinion on the matter is null and void. Even though she said this is not working too well, if she keeps it up as a kind of mantra she will start to believe it. It works for me anyway smile.
I completely understand your wish to make your friend feel better about her birth. My advice is just to listen and be a shoulder for her to cry on if that's what she needs. Please do NOT tell her to be happy that her baby is healthy -it is unlikely to make her feel better imo. Also consider what this may do for future births that she may be lucky enough to have. Are all these stories of big babies likely to undermine her confidence in her body to birth her next baby and therefore lead to another c/s ?
If you want to help your friend then be the one person that she can be honest with and one person that she doesn't have to put on a smile for and pretend that her healthy baby is the only thing that should matter.
Posted by: ~Ruby~Gloom~
I completely understand your wish to make your friend feel better about her birth. My advice is just to listen and be a shoulder for her to cry on if that's what she needs. Please do NOT tell her to be happy that her baby is healthy -it is unlikely to make her feel better imo. Also consider what this may do for future births that she may be lucky enough to have. Are all these stories of big babies likely to undermine her confidence in her body to birth her next baby and therefore lead to another c/s ?
If you want to help your friend then be the one person that she can be honest with and one person that she doesn't have to put on a smile for and pretend that her healthy baby is the only thing that should matter.
Wow ...I never thought of it like that ...I completely see your point !!
Posted by: bridiejo
Here, pass this on to the MIL...
The baby is alive.

and give her a slap in the head for me smile


First of all... BAHAHAHAHAHA!! That's awesome. I laughed so hard...

and second, just for my two cents,

I had a c-section, not an emergency because they new from about half term that i wasn't going to be able to give birth naturally (i have a heart shaped uterus which meant he couldn't come down- cant remember what that's called again) I was devastated, it took me a long time to come to term with it... But eventually i have become comfortable with the fact that, yes, doctors may suggest alternatives, but generally when it comes down to it, they only want what's in the best interests of mum and bub. If it wasn't for one doctor insisting on me having a c-section (even though others where quite willing to let me try naturally)- my son and i would probably be dead.
Tell your friend that the upset/disappointment or even feeling of failure that she has now WILL pass and not to let her MIL get to her, everyone just needs to be thankful that she has a healthy strong baby boy, not how it happened- just that it happened.
Aww i feel sorry for your friend having her MIL tell her that..
I had a C sec 2 years ago and while i was hoping to have a natural birth i was a little bit dissapointed but at the end of the day the baby is healthy the mother is fine and thats all that matters.
To have someone telling you that you've failed by having a C section is just wrong. C sections are around now days to help mothers where years ago so many more mothers and babies were lost during childbirth.

Silly woman.

It is such a shame that people can't just be happy that both Mum & Bub are happy & healthy.

But unfortunetly, just like the BF Vs FF - it will never go away. People ALWAYS have to have "their" comment on it.


My sis has just had her baby on Friday night. She pushed for a few hours and had forceps. Then was taken into theartre where they tried the forceps again.
Then they ended up doing a c-section and bubs was stuck - but was not coming out easily EITHER way.
The Dr ended up having to get both his arms inside and yank her out. Poor thing.

And my sis is a big girl and her DD was the same size as my DD2 - 9lb 7oz. Yet I did it naturally with no drugs and she wasn't able. And I'm a much smaller frame than her...
So just goes to show EVERY body is so different and doesn't matter at the end of the day so long as everyone is OK!

Women ARE designed to give birth... it's a biological fact! That doesn't mean that every mother, every baby and every birth are the same!

There is nothing worse then feeling powerless when giving birth to your child and if you're unhappy about your birth it can really affect your confidence as a mother. I hope your friend can see past MIL's comments and go back to feeling positive again.

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