Huggies Forum

If you don't smack your kids Lock Rss

....
I think it comes down to whether you feel it was warranted or was it just over nothing. And if it has upset you, than obviously it wasnt warranted, and if you dont approve, say you can visit, but you do not smack your kids in my house (after all it is your house, your rules). I think i have only ever smacked my son in public once and it was when he ran out in front of a car and i was that upset that i just did it without thinking.

However i do occasionally smack my kids at home, but again has to be warranted. There are much better punishments that you can give a child. I dont approve of kids being smacked for no reason, it has to be warranted, and if its a parent that i know smacks there kids and i dont feel like it is necessary i interviene before it gets that bad.
I guess people don't change their discipline styles just because they are "out" somewhere.
I have been known to smack and most of our friends have done too so it doesn't really bother me if they do it at my house.
Having said that, I do get funny about the way some of our friends speak to their children when they are with us, or in front of my boys. I think some of the things they say encourage their children to be cheeky/rude towards them and I have to bite my tongue when they do it in front of me. I don't want their behaviour influencing my children IYKWIM.

For the record .... Im still on some kick arse pain relief so if that makes no sense I apologise smile

....
I think it's normal for you to feel a bit uncomfortable about it because you don't smack. I have a friend who smacks her DD so much and it makes me uncomfortable; mainly because her DD is under 12 months and she seems to do it every 5 minutes for really trivial things. It's like, "don't put that in your mouth, SMACK", "don't snatch that toy, SMACK", "don't touch the remote, SMACK". But it's not my place to stick my nose in, and I wouldn't.

I don't think you should not invite them over again, I think you just have to accept that this is her form of punishment. Are you worried that your kids might learn hitting from her?
...
...
I do smack but something pretty bad has to happen for it to happen. Like running in front of cars or other dangerous things. Also time out does not seem to work at home but i've used it when out and man it works. Also I would pull dd1 away from the suituation even if I felt a smack was in order. We don't smack much now as it doesn't work.

What did the little girl do? Also the fact that it was three separate times means to me it didn't work. A couple of weeks ago I pulled up dd1 and a little boy for playing with ball after being told three times to stop. I they both lost the ball until it was time to go home (only 5 mins) now that felt weird but his mum was busy and I would expect anyone else to do that with my girls if the were being unsafe.

So give us the goss would you have displined for the reasons this mum did even if differently?

Yes and no, I mean my oldest kids understand that some mums smack and their mum has other means (lol) but my DD isn't quite 2 and I don't like her seeing other mummies belting their kids, esp over such trivial things. I don't want her to learn now that big people hit little people as I don't want her taking that to play group or kinder gym iygwim.


Ok, that makes sense. Maybe you could talk to her about it and see if she'll hold off on the smacks while at your house. It depends on what kind of person she is, she might take offence, but I guess you'll have an idea of how she would take it.
I don't think you're overreacting, you're completely entitled to feel how how you choose to feel! No one can make you feel otherwise. smile Have you thought about why you feel uncomfortable? Perhaps if you can pinpoint exactly why you get a bit upset when people do smack their children then maybe you can be more aware of your emotions and why you react the way you do? I'm not saying there's necessarily an underlying cause, it just sounds as though you seem a little unsure as to why you feel this way?

For me personally, I find that time-out works much more effectively if we're with other children. DS hates that he can't play with the other kids so it's our most effective form of public discipline. smile DS is also 2.5 and we usually don't need to go past the threat of a smack - he listens and obeys when presented with the possibility of a smack (mostly). As for other people smacking in my home, it doesn't really bother me. However, if I believe the punishment didn't fit the crime, then yes, I'd probably be a bit uncomfortable and unsure whether I should say anything or just leave it...

I guess people don't change their discipline styles just because they are "out" somewhere.
I have been known to smack and most of our friends have done too so it doesn't really bother me if they do it at my house.
Having said that, I do get funny about the way some of our friends speak to their children when they are with us, or in front of my boys. I think some of the things they say encourage their children to be cheeky/rude towards them and I have to bite my tongue when they do it in front of me. I don't want their behaviour influencing my children IYKWIM.

For the record .... Im still on some kick arse pain relief so if that makes no sense I apologise smile



I hate when kids get cheeky in public, DP always encourages it and pisses me off so bad as he lets him keep going and keep going until it gets down right rude and then DS doesnt listen to me as DP said it was ok.
....
Sign in to follow this topic