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Have no idea what to do... Lock Rss

So my best friend and I are no longer friends. She fails to comprehend that I have obligations as a mother and we have had a HUGE falling out, I do not want to be friends with her anymore and think she is quite a pathetic person really. Anyway, that's beside the point.

I'm getting married in November and she was supposed to be my maid of honour. I have one other bridesmaid currently and have bought EVERYTHING for them, their dress, shoes, jewellery and gifts, etc. My ex BF has the jewellery and of course the gift I gave her when I asked her to be my MOH. She hasn't mentioned returning anything and I wasn't going to ask, but should I?

And what should I do about my bridal party now? Any suggestions?
I don't see why you shouldn't ask for it back?
It's your stuff - you paid for it...
Unless you're prepared to cut your losses and forget all about it and her smile

I'd send her a message and ask her to either post it all to you or arrange for someone to pick it up/drop it off for you.



I don't see why you shouldn't ask for it back?
It's your stuff - you paid for it...
Unless you're prepared to cut your losses and forget all about it and her smile

I'd send her a message and ask her to either post it all to you or arrange for someone to pick it up/drop it off for you.

yup...try an sms. If you ring her you may end up in another big fight.
If this is just a new situation I would say just let the dust settle a bit before you make a big decision.

I was in the same situation last year. I had a friend of 20 yrs being my cheif bridesmaid and a friend of 10 years being my bridesmaid and had a falling out with both of them at the same time.

It was during a time that we were finding out that my dad had a secondary cancer which was terminal, and finding out how long he was expected to live. I had done really well until my 2 friends did something to upset me and the floodgates about everything opened and I asked for them to give some space to work through how I was feeling.

They did an interventiona dn told me I needed medicating, shouldnt get married, should spend more time out with them, stop breastfeeding so I could drink, and not think of my family when I was with them and they made a choice not to be my friend anymore.

I let the dust settle and after 10 weeks I asked my 2 SIL's to be my bridesmaids -oh god Im crying now- and they were nice enough to do it for me. They were the same size of my first bridesmaids.

3 weeks after I did that one of the friends-10 yr friendship- came to me and we worked things out, though it will never be the same. I had to tell her that her spot was now taken.

I found it hard because my family in Aussie adn my new bridesmaids were only really there on the day so I had to do most of my planning by myself.

So I really understand where you are coming from and it is sad that this has happened for you because it is really hard to deal with. I say take a few weeks to make your decision, and if you decide to ask someone else then ask your ex friend for the gifts back.

I really hope that this works out to be a happy resolution either way, my one regret during my wedding preps was that I suddenly didnt have my friends there to support me.

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Your thread made me so sad.

I lost my very best friend too of 18 years.

And she is also getting married without me.

Its so very sad, I think 18 years is such a huge chunk of ones life, why would you want to give all that up, what would be so bad enough to end something so beautiful.?

I hope you and your friend work it out and find your happiness.
Like the other girls have said, if it is relatively new, let things settle before making any decisions.

But if you are decided and know you wont change your mind i would be asking her for those things back as you have paid for them.

Big hugs for you! When Dh and i got married, he had his 2 brothers whom he was very close with as his groomsman and bestman and my brother as another groomsman. Well without going into detail none of his family came to our wedding due to selfishness and DH opted to just have my brother as his bestman (they are pretty close). So our bridal party was 3 bridesmaids and 1 bestman and it worked out fine. The seating and photos etc all worked out perfect in the end! GL, its hard but you have to do what makes you happy as its your day! =)
My DD is getting married in November too and she has had a huge falling out with her MOH......so she is no longer part of the wedding(or even invited)

Her bridesmaide dresses were already bought so she had to find someone the same size,so that limited who she could ask and she had to think of the person who replaced the MOH.........would they think no way Im 2nd choice?
It turned out really well and the person replacing the MOH will just be a bridesmaid(no MOH now)and she is thrilled.

As for the jewelry...Id ask for that back but let her keep the "gift" you gave her.

Goodluck with it all xx
If the jewellery was really expensive or you could replace it if you had to for another bridesmaid then yeah I would probably send an sms and ask her to post it back to you.

Could you possibly just promote the other bridesmaid to MOH, then sort out if you want to ask someone else or leave it with just one bridesmaid/MOH person.

Even if you sort out the issues with your friend I doubt things would ever go back to being the same, therefore would you even want her in your bridal party. I would just move on to sorting out whats going to work best for you and go with it. Leading up to a wedding you really dont need the extra stress or drama.

Julia (14yrs), Cooper (6yrs) & Amarlia (14 months)

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