Huggies Forum

The Huggies Forum is closed for new replies and topics, you can still read older topics.

when dd meets her sibling Lock Rss

Just thinking ahead.

I feel really strongly that dd should meet her sibling before anyone else does. But I'm not sure if its going to offend whoever is bringing her to us. It might be my parents or it might be some friends. Is it rude to make them wait outside the room?

I am having visuals of my mother swooping in and taking over by picking him/her up and then showing dd before we get to spend any time together as a new family.

And if its born in the middle of the night did you wait til morning to show your other kids? When dd was born my parents were up there straight away at 430am! If dd is asleep I really don't want them there first - however if they know I'm in labour they will be there ASAP and mum will keep ringing the hospital to find out because she knows and works with the nurses.





Just thinking ahead.

I feel really strongly that dd should meet her sibling before anyone else does. But I'm not sure if its going to offend whoever is bringing her to us. It might be my parents or it might be some friends. Is it rude to make them wait outside the room?

I am having visuals of my mother swooping in and taking over by picking him/her up and then showing dd before we get to spend any time together as a new family.

And if its born in the middle of the night did you wait til morning to show your other kids? When dd was born my parents were up there straight away at 430am! If dd is asleep I really don't want them there first - however if they know I'm in labour they will be there ASAP and mum will keep ringing the hospital to find out because she knows and works with the nurses.


I told my parents and DH's parents that DD1 was going to be the first person to meet the baby, no questions asked. That was the most important thing to us as a family. Luckily both sets of parents respected that. I had DD2 in the middle of the night, mum looked after DD1 at home and DH went home before she woke up. He brought her to the hospital, explaining where I was etc (I went into labour when she was asleep) We made sure that we had around an hour before anyone else arrived.

I think from there the two girls' relationship has thrived because, so far, there hasn't been an ounce of jealousy. When everyone came to the hospital DD1 announced to anyone who would listen she had a sister and she was beaming.

If you want your daughter to see the baby first and be a family first then I think you should make everyone aware. Hopefully they respect your decision.
My parent's bought up both DS1 and DS2 respectively with the birth of each sibling. They respected our need to have family time first before anyone else so they just waited outside til we were ready for them.

We also had a gift from the baby for the older sibling/s to 'break the ice.' To this day, DS1's gift from DS2 is his favourite toy to take to bed.



My DS was born at 5:30pm and my DD came to visit the next day. My parents in law brought her to the hospital but we asked them to wait downstairs for a while until we had some family time so my husband went down and got her and they were absolutely fine with it. He called them when we were ready and then they got to visit.
Whoever is looking after her should understand that you want her to see the baby first and spend some family time together before everyone else visits and i think it is a lovely idea.
I had a c-section so my parents and inlaws knew what day it was but i rung DS1 afterwards myself and told him he had a little brother and what his name was and he told them himself & DP left the hosp to go get DS1 and bring him up and we told everyone else that they could visit at a certain time which was about an hour after DS1 came up so we could have family time alone before visitors



im due with my 2nd baby girl in january and am thinking about this aswell. we will get my mum to look after our little girl while im in labour and make it very clear to them that she will be the 1st to meet her and they'll have to wait until weve had our family time to meet her along with the rest of the family. im sure they will be fine with it and respect our wishes.so nope i dont think its rude at all!
we were also worried about this when DS arrived as MIL and SIL were watching DD, i went into labout very early in the morning and DS was born at about 8am. DH decided to go and get DD and bring her himself for 2 main reasons 1) so we didnt have that issue at all with his mum and dad (but i think they wouldve been ok with it anyway) and 2) with him bringing her we felt she may be more comfortable she was only 15months at the time. can ur hubby do that instead then you have as much time as you need before inviting others to visit. its your choice no matter how you go about it and hopefully they will respect that smile
I didn't even think about dh going to pick her up. That's a great idea & I think we'll do that. I will be telling my parents they'll need to wait..... I'm not sure she'll pay any attention to that though. She tends to just do what she wants to do regardless... and dad is too gutless to stand up to her.

There's also a chance dd will be at school and we won't have to tell them until we're ready to! That would be nice but can't rely on that!

I work at this hospital - & there's no other hospital to go to. My mum & 4 aunties work there too.... and I know from other staff having babies that as soon as they go into labour everyone on that shift knows about it straight away. And if there's an aunt on that shift - they'll call my mum straight away. Grrrrr!




You will only get one chance to do it so if that is what you want you need to speak up and say exactly what you want. Your DP will also have to speak up and enforce it if anyone doesn't agree. It is your baby so you have the right to do whatever you wish.

My DD2 was born in the evening and my mum stayed home with DD1. The next day DH and my mum bought DD1 to the hospital but my mum (and other visitors that had arrived!) waiting outside the room while we had some family time.
Perhaps to avoid any crossover (ie your mum barging in etc) you could either have your dh meet your parents/dd nearby (hospital cafe or somewhere near the hospital) so that he can pick her up and then they can follow an hour or so later. That way they're not waiting outside the door and you're not feeling the pressure of their presence waiting anxiously to meet their new grandchild. In the case of you birthing during the night then perhaps by morning your dh will be wanting a shower and change of clothes so he could still collect your dd from ILs and bring her down to see you and new babe.
I wanted just hubby and little master to be the first vistors but fil doesn't care what i wanted he listen to mil who told him to go in the morning. Hubby told him to wait for him to call. When little master came in i wanted him to see his brother first and know that we loved both of them. My mum was there but she waited outsided till hubby called her in. Just wish FIL repected my wishes.





I didn't even think about dh going to pick her up. That's a great idea & I think we'll do that. I will be telling my parents they'll need to wait..... I'm not sure she'll pay any attention to that though. She tends to just do what she wants to do regardless... and dad is too gutless to stand up to her.

There's also a chance dd will be at school and we won't have to tell them until we're ready to! That would be nice but can't rely on that!

I work at this hospital - & there's no other hospital to go to. My mum & 4 aunties work there too.... and I know from other staff having babies that as soon as they go into labour everyone on that shift knows about it straight away. And if there's an aunt on that shift - they'll call my mum straight away. Grrrrr!


I think it is definately a good idea to get your partner to bring dd in to the hospital - that way its also less daunting for her than arriving at an unfamiliar place without mum or dad. I think that your family should have the respect to wait too - especially if you have specified that this is how it is going to be!

If you are worried about them barging in etc. just specify to the nurses that you would not like any other visitors at this stage - this way you can be sure that you will have quality time with your own little family first smile
Sign in to follow this topic