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Hi! I was wondering if anyone could please help me, give me advice, or whatever else regarding a comment that a woman who works at my DD's school made on Facebook last night. My daughter has Asperger's syndrome, and she gets teased at school quite a lot. Last night I vented on FB about bullies at school, and a few minutes later she changed her status to:

"I really admire the teachers at my kids school, the amount of rot that they have to put with not only from the kids but from parents too. I do believe children that are needing special care should be at a special school and not disrupting other students"

I know this comment was directed at me, about my daughter, because we have a very small school and my daughter is the only child who attends who is anywhere near having special needs. I feel it is inappropriate for her to say things like that, considering that she is actually employed by the school to run an after school program. I recently removed my children from the program because they always came home in tears, and because she threw something at my DD1 once - a jumper, because my daughter had forgotten that she brought her jumper to school that day. Also, this woman was very rude to my DH a couple of weeks ago when he went to pick the girls up from the program - my DD1 had been teased and started crying, and this woman was not supervising at the time. I obviously removed my children from the program as a solution, but now she has made such a comment on FB I wonder if I should do anything about it? I printed the conversation, but should I show the school? I really have no idea what to do! Any help would be greatly appreciated!

kerrie, VIC, DD 12/8/03, DD 12/10/05, DD 14/9/07, DD 4/1/10

Unfortunately that is the problem with social media. As a person who works within the school she probably shouldn't be facebook friends with parents anyway. I don't know if mentioning it to the school would get you anywhere. No harm in trying thoguh. However, as she didn't mention you by name they'd likely just give her a warning. It isn't appropriate for her to be making comments like that when she works within the school and she should be spoken to about that. Delete her off your facebook page and block her.
Thanks for your reply! She was facebook friends with me before she started working at the school. I'm more concerned about her general attitude rather than any reference to me, I don't think it is a good attitude for someone who works at a school to have.

kerrie, VIC, DD 12/8/03, DD 12/10/05, DD 14/9/07, DD 4/1/10

It definitely isn't a good attitude. It would be worth a chat with the principal about it, at least then the woman would be spoken to and would in future watch what she says.
It sounds like this women is a bully and that's one thing i hate. Your DD needs to feel safe and enjoy her school years ( i never did thanks to bullying).

I think you do need to speak to the school with everything that this person has done and said to you and your DH and especially your DD. They need to be informed of things like this so they can stop the bullying spreading.

I hope your DD enjoys her school years and enjoys her school holidays.

Thanks! The school knows about past incidents - we spoke with the principal and she brushed our concerns to the side. We are getting a new principal next year, hopefully that person will be more open to the problems with this kind of attitude. When I spoke with the principal about how this woman treats my DD1, she said that they have no one else to run the program, so there is nothing they can do. I think this program is better off not existing than being run by this person - but that's just my opinion!

kerrie, VIC, DD 12/8/03, DD 12/10/05, DD 14/9/07, DD 4/1/10

The comments made are very unproffessional of a person employed to work with children, and extremely hurtfull, nasty and un called for.

I would be making a appointment with the principal and showing him these posts, and pointing out how dissapoointed and upset you are with the unproffessional attitude and comments, that one of his staff have made.

I realyl hope that the principal takes some form of action against this person.

For example the early childhood educators i work for there is a standard rule that we donot comment on any work related issue or make unproffessional comments , if we do we are breaching our contract, regarding privacy.

And this would result in one of three things counselling sessions, a written apologie to the person's involved and in a extreme case instant dissmisul..

This kind of un caring, with there hurtful and very unproffessional comments are the type of people who give early childhood educators a bad reputation.

Please note most early childhood educators are very caring and kind people, who want to nuture your children.

Thanks! I agree with you, it was very unprofessional of her. While it is hurtful to me, I do find it perplexing that a parent in this day and age actually has this opinion! I will speak to the principal about it - whether or not anything is done I have no idea. I don't have a problem with any of the teachers - I find them supportive and they are very open to implementing things in the classroom to help my DD1 - this is something that has taken us time to achieve, but we are getting there! The principal hasn't been open to applying for assistance for my DD in the classroom, but we are hoping this will change with the next principal. We are trying our best to have this school work for us as the next school is quite distant and will cost a lot to travel to!

kerrie, VIC, DD 12/8/03, DD 12/10/05, DD 14/9/07, DD 4/1/10

In my workplace people are held accountable for what they say on Facebook. She needs to not only be am example for the children she cares for but act professionally toward parents.

What she has said is discriminatory, derogatory and I would even class this as bullying. I would definitely be taking this up with the principal if I were you.

Think PP have summed up shes a *****


It cant be easy for your daughter, it would be nice if the school in braced your daughters asperger's syndrome, and taught the kids acceptance of people with unique traits. She shouldnt be treated any different from a kid thats hyperactive or ADHD etc. No kid should be singled out no matter what condition and shes definately no special needs kid but saying that i went to school and had special needs kids in our classes. It made no difference to my education and if anything it taught acceptance. Maybe teachers/principals these days need to look at some of the older teacher methods and values they taught along the way.

No offence to teachers out there, theres still some good ones but there are alot of young ones that have got into teacher not realising the amount of time you need to put into a nurturing a child to assist with their learning.

Sorry kinda went off topic!
Hi! Thanks for all the replies! Yes, she certainly is that! I have known this woman for around 6 years and she has always grated on my nerves, and has attacked my parenting on occasion, but I can deal with all that easily enough - after all, I attack my own parenting on a regular basis...he he! However, since she has worked at our school I have had a lot of problems with her - she is overly critical of children's behaviour, not considering that they have been at school a whole day before her program so they are likely to be tired, and she has put kids in time out for chewing on hat cords - she told me that it is because children can swallow them, and when they pull the string up it brings organs up with it...enough said...I was actually quite shocked that she blatantly put that up on FB, and that she hasn't taken it down! My cousins daughter also goes to that school, and the other day told my daughter that 'santa doesn't come to smelly girls like you' - which understandably made my DD very upset! My DH was there at the time so heard everything, and this girl ended up going to the office and had to write a letter home about what she did wrong, etc - and my cousin feels as if her daughter has been targeted by the teachers and thinks she should not be punished. I was angry at her attitude, and considering she is best friends with the woman who wrote that status on FB, I am very uncomfortable with ever speaking to her again. Anyway, sorry for that rant - I have been quite angry and stressed over this entire situation, but I will have to just deal with it! Thanks very much for the advice!

kerrie, VIC, DD 12/8/03, DD 12/10/05, DD 14/9/07, DD 4/1/10

I'm a teacher, we've been advised not to facebook friend any parent of our school (I am not on facebook at all anyway- hate it!).

I would hazard a guess that her comments are possibly breaking the code of conduct which all school staff have to abide by. If she isn't she is definitely making comments that would be unsupported by the school and department of education.

I would take the print out to the principal.

I would also de-friend her.
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