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5yr old and their friends! Lock Rss

Hi,

My DS has just started prep and is already on a behavioural chart for being "silly". I do understand what they mean by him being so excited about being there that he is hard to calm down.

My concern is that he has made a friend that is always in trouble and doing the wrong things and now my son is doing the same. My son spent 2 years at childcare where he was well behaved and not easily led by others. After parent teacher night I find out he is loud, silly and easily led by the other kids.

I am trying to tell him when this other boy is making wrong decisions to walk away and that maybe he should play with children that arent always getting into trouble.

I am new to this so maybe I am just being too precious- feel free to tell me!!!

Any advice would be great!!!!

Cheers

Hi,

My DS has just started prep and is already on a behavioural chart for being "silly". I do understand what they mean by him being so excited about being there that he is hard to calm down.

My concern is that he has made a friend that is always in trouble and doing the wrong things and now my son is doing the same. My son spent 2 years at childcare where he was well behaved and not easily led by others. After parent teacher night I find out he is loud, silly and easily led by the other kids.

I am trying to tell him when this other boy is making wrong decisions to walk away and that maybe he should play with children that arent always getting into trouble.

I am new to this so maybe I am just being too precious- feel free to tell me!!!

Any advice would be great!!!!

Cheers


Hi

I've been there, my 5 year old DD really liked the class clown in kindergarten and it took a while for her to settle down and stop being so easily distracted by him, she was so easily led and to her it was just having fun, she wasnt intending to be naughty. After a couple of months she did settle down and all was well. I did have to tell her that it was ok to play and muck around at recess and lunch but when they were in the classroom she needed to listen to the teacher. You cant pick their friends, they like who they like - you just have to try and steer them in the right direction about what is ok and not.

Its very early on in the year, I think in time he will settle down and that will be a matter of you telling him what's ok and not - and the teacher managing what's going on in the classroom, ie separating them as much as possible and teaching them how to behave at school. I can assure you though it would not just be your boy acting like this, they all have their moments, after all they are only 5 and do not behave themselves all the time.

Its a huge deal starting school, making friends, getting used to the routine... I'd give him a bit more time to settle down and just stay in regular contact with the teacher as to how he's going.

I'm not sure what you mean by he's on the behavioural chart for being silly - is that a public name and shame thing, if so that sounds really wrong, IMO they need to teach him and manage his behaviour without humiliation tactics and making him feel bad.
Oh gees one of my children IS the class clown LOL

I sometimes worry if other peoples parents tell their kids not to hang around him haha

But seriously I think it all works out. Both my boys have experienced getting in trouble on account of being led by others poor decisions. I explain to them that if they've done the wrong thing - even if someone else starts it - then that is too bad and they need to learn from it. Kids aren't silly, they learn if they do the right thing they get rewards. Plus friendships with boys is normally not terribly selective for long periods In prep - they mix around a fair bit. I would just reiterate to him about making the right choices for him and I am sure he'll work it all out wink
Yep- we have been there too. smile

My son was exactly the same when he started prep. He was such a good and well behaved kid in kindy/ daycare, it was a huge surprise to us that he was getting caught up in the flow and doing the wrong thing.

Things calmed down and he learnt for hinself when to join in and when to step back and do the right thing. For him the turning point was getting into 'trouble' from his teacher and having consequences that he thought only 'naughty' kids got (his words). As he is the kind of kid that likes to please that pulled him into line quickly, he was keen to get back in his teachers good books again!

I think things will settle down, choosing how to behave at school is something your son can only learn on his own. With a few gentle reminders here and there from mum of course.. lol!


Mr J (April 2005) Miss Z (Feb 2007) and Miss O (Oct 2010)

Thanks Everyone,

I think I will ride it out for the moment and just encourage good decisions.

The behaviour chart is just like a sticker chart so not anything that upsets him.

Ryjayd- I dont think I would mind if it was the class clown - but he is naughty and rude - nothing funny about him!!!

Hopefully it will all settle down in the next few weeks!

Thanks again!
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