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  5. coping with a FIFO partner... i hate being alone at night :'(

coping with a FIFO partner... i hate being alone at night :'( Lock Rss

my partner just got a job working away in W.A.. he's away for 3 weeks & then home for a week.. he's only been gone for 2 & i'm honestly finding it reallly hard... my daughteres acting up heaps now that he's not here & i don't really have anyone that can help me out. but i'll learn to cope...

the thing i'm really struggling with it being alone at night..
i just don't feel safe. i feel like someone is gonna break in or something..
i've been sleeping with my daughter in my bed so i'm not alone, i triple check all the doors are locked. i'm constantly listening out for noises.. I have a knife high up in my wardrobe (out of little ones reach) I know i'm over reacting but I seriously need some help to overcome it.. any suggestions? I can't ask him to quit work. that's just ridiculous. but i'm an absolute wreck at night time. HELP

I can't say I know how you feel, but whenever my partner has to go away overnight for work I freak out much the same way.. and it's only for a few nights! I'm quite lucky though as I have to two big dogs, one of which thinks he's a guard dog, so I always feel safe having them sleeping near me. Is it possible for you to get a dog? I know dogs and kids don't always mix, but maybe when your partner comes back for a week you could go out and try to find one. They really do make a huge difference smile
i was thinking maybe i could get a dog, i've got a 4 month old and a 2 1/2 year old so i already have my hands pretty full.. but my daughter would love a puppy..

It will get easier but a dog is a really good idea! DH was working away for 2 on 1 off when DS was two weeks old and I also had little support. I think I had cornflakes for nearly every meal in that first two weeks lol

I loved having my dog for company and even though he was a big softy, knowing he was there made me sleep a lot easier!

any chance you could move to be with him, or at least closer - as in the closest mining town?? Everyone should live in WA at some time - it has fabbo weather...

but, on a serious note - FIFO is hard, hard on the man, the wife, the mother, the kids & the dad... IMO everyone misses out on something important. We live in the goldfields now, as DH took a job over here & it's still hard, as he is gone for 13 hours a day, but at least he gets to see & cuddle the kids every day - either first thing in the morning before they go to school, or he is home at dinner time, so spends some time with them before bed.

Not to mention that my emotional needs are mostly met as well wink
if you do get a dog, it would be best if you could find one that comes from a family home that the family no longer wants, that way they tend to be use to children (children can be horrid to dogs, and dogs don't understand that a child pulling on its ears, slapping it and poking it in the eye is just a child thing, which causes them to react) and an older dog would be less work for you, no puppy school!
My dog who thinks he's oh so tough, goes on nightly patrols around the house when my partners away, he checks every door and window to make sure I'm safe.. then jumps up next to me, licks my hand and lays down facing the door.. the other just hogs the bed, happy that she hasn't been kicked off tongue
Im living In wa and my partner is In Ireland finishing up work before he can join me and bump! It's hard but has to be done unfortunately. Scan tomorrow which he will miss and he is very upset about! Can't wait for him to join me here in August/September! Hold on in there and keep smiling smile x

When i first started dating my DH he used to work 3weeks on 3weeks off. At the time, it was ok because we were trying to pay off our home before we got married. 2 years before we got married he got a job near home and quit the mine work.

Well the local project he was working on finished in Dec 2011 and he waas been doing temping. He wants a career change but is finding it hard. He has hard enough of working as a temp.

Anyway, he informed a couple of nights ago...he thinks he might need to head back to the mines. We need a bigger house as we live in small home and have a DD and are planning on another one/two.

I am not happy, I don't want him to go, but somehow I have to find the strength and let this happen again or pray to god that a great local job comes up!!.

I feel your pain..good luck.
my partner left today and i'm missing him so much already sad feel so bad i didnt give him a huge cuddle cause i didnt want to burst into tears so wish i had of now.......... we dont know the roster yet but it's a whole day flight from QLD to WA ( left at 8.30 and gets there at 5.30 ) so he wont be home very often we are planning to move to wa in january then hopefully he'll be able to come home more but at this stage we dont think he'll be back for around 3 months .... not sure how im going to cope but i know why where doing it but its going to be hard ...

SORRY ok back to your problem smile
in the past and am going to start doing it again now

we have windchimes / christmas bells on doors also door wedges on front and back door so they couldnt be opened from outside

pieces of wood in the windows so they can only open a little

plus i had a cricket bat just down next to my bed incase

and when kids were little i had a baby moniter in the room so i could hear everything

hope this helps smile
Hi ladies... Are any of you on the Gold Coast? I'm 31 and a mum to a boy 9 weeks. I don't know many people up here and struggle with the FIFO isolation. My man does 20 on 10 off. I'd love to hear from you smile
Whereisshivnow wrote:
Hi ladies... Are any of you on the Gold Coast? I'm 31 and a mum to a boy 9 weeks. I don't know many people up here and struggle with the FIFO isolation. My man does 20 on 10 off. I'd love to hear from you smile

I recommend joining a Facebook page called FIFO Connections. It's basically a support group for FIFO wives and partners. There's members from across Australia but the Admin are based in Brisbane so they're always organizing meet ups. Hope this helps.

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