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Ladies please confirm I'm being silly! Updated =) Lock Rss

So DH has been invited to a bucks night for a friend of a friend. Now usually I have no problem with bucks nights and strippers, but for some reason I REALLY don't want him to go to this one!

It's on a big property up in the hills and is a 'bring your swag or tent and stay the night' type deal. They're having 10 strippers and well tbh I have worked in this industry many years ago before having kids - please don't judge me laugh laugh and I know exactly what will be going on with that many girls at a home party!

My problem is I guess that I'll be 29 weeks pregnant with my 3rd baby. I'm already struggling with how my body is looking and changing and I feel like a whale and completely unattractive and I have stretch marks and all that and quite frankly I'd rather my husband wasn't out drooling over other women that have amazing bodies in that situation while I feel like this sad

I told him I didn't want him to go and he got annoyed at me lol

I know I'm being silly about it all but I can't help the way I feel and I'm pretty sure I can't tell him he can't go laugh

Thanks for reading, I just had to get that out grin






Ur not being 'silly' hun. It's just the hormones and irrational thinking and worrying they cause in us pregnant women! Xx
But I do agree u can't tell him he can't go. That's just mean anyway. Would u like being told u couldn't go to a gfs hens party at any point?? Not many girls would take that well so he had a right to get 'annoyed' when u brought it up.
I'm self conscious anyway but when pregs I go overboard n freak out about my body especially around a guy I love. I just get paranoid and wonder if he still wants me cos I myself feel too fat n in attractive to see reason - its ALL the hormones hun. Relax, totally normally to feel that way in a tough situation like that smile
But if u trust him n know he loves u just keep telling urself that cos at the end of it he'll come home to u, only u, n that's what matters!! Xx



I'd feel the exact same. I don't have a prob with the occasional stripper but this is a bit different I think.

Maybe compromise and say he can go but to please come home so he doesn't stay the night?

The other guys will understand if you pregnant with 2 other kids... Or just say your feeling tired and unwell and need him home earlier. That way he doesn't miss out on some of the bucks night.

I'm a prude, my hubby is only aloud to look at my naked body not someone who body is thinner and perfect.

If your Dh really has to go why can't he say i go to the main thing but i come home at 1 in the morning.

Your not being silly, you understand what could go on and you don't feel happy about it, he shouldn't go.




Thanks for all the replies, I feel a bit better knowing I'm not the only one that would feel like this!

He said he thinks I don't trust him, it's not that I don't trust him, it's just that I'd prefer he wasn't out watching girl on girl action right in front of him and having body parts shoved in his face whilst I'm at home being fat and pregnant and looking after the kids wondering what he's doing and how drunk he is etc...

I couldn't give two hoots if this was at a strip club, security is a whole lot stricter there and girls aren't allowed to show any *ahem* pink bits LOL at a home party pretty much anything goes in my experience smile

And I really don't want him staying the night, that's why they have taxis right?!

Gahhh I don't know what to do!






tickled*pink wrote:
If this was a bucks night at a strip club I wouldn't care tbh. But ten strippers at someone's house is just over the top and I wouldn't be happy. Does your hubby know what's in store for the night? Do half the guys going know?

While I wouldn't necessarily say "you're not going" I wouldn't be his best friend if he even contemplated it.


i am the same. the standard strip joint for a bucks night wouldnt phase me but 10 at a private house?? dh would not be going and i'd expect him to come to that decision himself.
Hi, just a question, would you be able to contact him there if something happened?
My waters broke at 29 weeks and i was rushed to a hosp out of town, my hubby was away working and it was very hard.
Not saying this would happen to you, but will he be available for you if you needed him?
[quote post="3249387" name="Rosie Mumma"][b]Rosie Mumma wrote[/b]:
[quote post="3249315" name="Skippy And The Greek"][b]Skippy And The Greek wrote[/b]:
I hate this subject. Your his partner, he shouldn't go just BECAUSE of how this is making you feel regardless.Thats the point of being in a relationship, taking concideration of your partners feelings in all situations. And trying to work out a solution. The solution here is he miss this one party, quote]

I have to disagree with you Skippy. Fair enough they should try and find a solution but I think a compromise would be more fair. Maybe he comes home after the party, doesn't stay the night for example? I don't think you're being silly at all, you have every right to feel this way but I also think telling him he can't go because you feel insecure isn't really fair. Has he ever given you a reason to not trust him before? I know myself I would be mighty p'ed off if DH said I shouldn't go somewhere simply
because he didn't want me to. And if he said he didn't want me to go because he didn't trust me I would be absolutely gobsmacked.

Absolutely I think you should let him know how you feel, give him a chance to put your mind at ease but there's no way I would be saying he can't go. I'm not in your relationship though, you should do what feels right for you hun. Hope it works out.[/quote]

+1000 Hun. Well said Rosie Mumma!

I think a compromise is always best and I'd never ever tell my partner he couldn't go to a social thing just because I wasn't comfortable etc. unless he's given a reason not to trust him in the past I reckon he should be allowed to go? But if it helps then tell him to come home instead of stay.
I don't Think u should be trying to STOP him going though.
But as others have said u have to work it out with ur hubby and do what's right for YOUR relationship hun smile x



My bf would def not be going and would understand why.. 10 strippers is over the top and i have seen what they do and have seen guys drunk and cheat because one of them sits on there knee naked and starts doing stuff to them... I am so against strippers, even male strippers.. there would be no way i would have strippers at my hens night and my bf wouldnt have female strippers at his! I dont understand why it happens... you marrying the person you love and you want to celebrate with a naked complete stranger? grrrr this topic gets me sooo angry haha...
I wouldnt mind if my bf went to a bucks night and was at a strip club but 10 girls at a house is calling for trouble!
Not being silly.
From what I know of strippers and bux nights if your. Having ten girls at a one party there is gonna be touching iykwim.

Now im not comfortable with that personally, I dont mind if dh looks but im gonna be pissed off if he touches. Not even sure im comfortable with lap dances tbh.
If others are comfortable with that then more power to them.

Also, if I was 30 weeks pregnant id feel gross and not want dh looking at other women either.
I think your feelings are well justified.
Xx




OOOHHH... INTERNET FIGHT. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? CAPS LOCK ME TOO DEATH?
(Noddy's not fat ffs!)

Rachy1987 wrote:
10 strippers is over the top and i have seen what they do and have seen guys drunk and cheat because one of them sits on there knee naked and starts doing stuff to them...

I dont understand why it happens... you marrying the person you love and you want to celebrate with a naked complete stranger? grrrr this topic gets me sooo angry haha...
I wouldnt mind if my bf went to a bucks night and was at a strip club but 10 girls at a house is calling for trouble!


I agree with the above comments. You are not overreacting. Don't let him put it back on you. Hope you can come to a compromise.
I'd show him your original post. No point hiding your thoughts from the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, so put it out there and don't sugar coat it!



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