Huggies Forum

Sex problems Rss

First let me say I love my husband and don't want to be with anyone else. He is a good man. The problem is he sucks in the bedroom. He is a one min guy. 2 if I am lucky. For play last a few mins and is only boobs and down below. Then he is straight up for a shower. He is also very clumsy. Misses parts always asking me if this is ok or is this what I want. That turns me off more. I have talked to my husband about this. We have tried dressing up, creams and sprays to make it last longer. I have told him what I like and what I don't I have told him what I need. There have been a handful of times in the last 8 years that we have had good sex.

I am very frustrated. I want to enjoy sex with my husband. Any ideas on how?

Have you tried toys for yourself to use with him? They can be lots of fun wink
Yes we have toys. Still not working. He is just so quick with everything. Or always asking me if this or that is or that is ok.

I'm getting to the point where I don't want to have sex with him because it's not worth it. At the same time I do want to have sex with him because I love him and want to be with him.
I am at the other end of the scale. We dont have sex due to my chronic health problems. My poor hubbie.

In your case maybe some more talking between you two. You need to be up front again with where things are not working for you & vise versa for him. Maybe both go to a gp together & explain whats happening as in he is too quick & gp might give your hubbie some Viagra pills to help him out.

Final thought would be see a sex therapist. I hope you guys can sort it out. Good luck.




It sounds like he suffers from premature ejaculation for a start.. It is easily treated these days, with either tablets or nasal sprays. I know it must be embarAdrassing for him, but maybe he could talk to the doctor about addressing the primary issue..

Do you ever show him what you like? Like while he does it, you say like this, yes thats good no thats not? And talked to him about what you want? Maybe he doesn't realise you want more and detailed foreplay before sex?

Ultimately, he has to learn about your body, and you'll have to show him how to do it a little more than just tell him?

I hope that helps and you can make it worthwhile smile

I have asked him to go to the doctor. He made an appointment and never went. I can't make him go. I have tried the no talking rule and will try it again.

sad I'm sorry. It's a hard situation (no pun intended) I know it sounds weird but would sex therapy help?
I have shown him what I like and don't, he has done the same. I have written letters shown him alkyd to him. Yesterday I told him what I wanted him to do when the kids got to bed and I still didn't get it.
I have even given him set by step instructions on what to.

I have written dirty text messages, tried to have sex more then a few time a day just hoping he can stay up.

I feel angry, sad frustrated and unimportant. I have told him all of this
I know this sounds harsh but maybe you'll just have to say that until he tries to make it good, or at least better for you, you want to atop having sex for a while. Maybe it will help him think about your needs a bit more.
Nay7 wrote:
I know this sounds harsh but maybe you'll just have to say that until he tries to make it good, or at least better for you, you want to atop having sex for a while. Maybe it will help him think about your needs a bit more.

As a man he would feel so belittled and emasculated by not being able to perform. This could be embarrassing and depressing for him. I think the issue is more than just physiological and its something that needs medical attention to fix. He needs support, love and encouragement to go seek help. Wayward can you go with him to the doctor?




Pinkie Pie wrote:
Nay7 wrote:
I know this sounds harsh but maybe you'll just have to say that until he tries to make it good, or at least better for you, you want to atop having sex for a while. Maybe it will help him think about your needs a bit more.
As a man he would feel so belittled and emasculated by not being able to perform. This could be embarrassing and depressing for him. I think the issue is more than just physiological and its something that needs medical attention to fix. He needs support, love and encouragement to go seek help. Wayward can you go with him to the doctor?


This!!! I know it must be really hard and frustrating for you but I can't IMAGINE how horrible it would be for him to know he's not satisfying his partner. I think sitting down and having a heart to heart about the fact that you need him to go to the doctor and booking you guys in for sex therapy might help. Maybe you guys need a couples councelling session or two - not so much to work through your problems but to facilliate communication in a safe, non-hurtful way.

Wayward I know it must be frustrating and you must feel like he doesn't care, but his sexual self esteem must be so low, I'm sure its upsetting and difficult for him to have sex to begin with and sensing your lack of satisfaction is probably making it worse.
Pinkie Pie wrote:
Nay7 wrote:
I know this sounds harsh but maybe you'll just have to say that until he tries to make it good, or at least better for you, you want to atop having sex for a while. Maybe it will help him think about your needs a bit more.
As a man he would feel so belittled and emasculated by not being able to perform. This could be embarrassing and depressing for him. I think the issue is more than just physiological and its something that needs medical attention to fix. He needs support, love and encouragement to go seek help. Wayward can you go with him to the doctor?


I did not mean that she should belittle him, but he also should be willing to get help. Waywad said she had made him a Drs appointment and he wouldn't go. They have tried sprays etc and they did not work. I agree they should go to the Dr together which is why I suggested a sex therapist in a previous post. My DH would do whatever he needed to if he had this problem, as he believes sex is supposed to be enjoyable for both. If I'm not enjoying it, he doesn't enjoy it. Waywad should definitely love and support her partner with his problem, but the problems aren't going to be fixed if he's not willing to try some more solutions.
Sign in to follow this topic