Attack of the Breast Brigade

I had a scary run in today with two very opinionated women (I refuse to call them ladies) who started yelling at me in an almost full cafe because I was feeding my 14 month old daughter some milk out of a bottle.

Now some background information, this was actually expressed breast milk (not that I have anything against formula, some people need it) that I heated up in a cup of boiling water to give my daughter after she had a sandwich. My daughter grinds her teeth during feeds when she is teething so I generally express milk rather than facing the prospect of losing a nipple.

Anyway this woman and her friend march over and state very loudly "You do know you're practically killing that baby." What followed was a very long and embarrassing rant (in the now silent cafe) about "idiotic women that are too selfish to do what is best for their children" among other comments, most of which I couldn't process because I was in a state of shock.

By this stage my daughter was crying because of the yelling and the woman was practically standing in my lap so I was stuck between her and the wall so there was no escape. During all of this I hadn't said one word except to try and calm my daughter when finally some other patrons stepped in.

To cut it short, after lots more shouting by various patrons and the women, the manager finally told the women to leave and not to come back. Their parting shot was "people like me don't deserve children." I was so numb that I just sort of sat there stunned that this had happened, until a very nice man offered to walk me to my car to make sure I wasn't bothered again.

Even now I can't really process what happened it's taken on that horrible fuzzy feeling that you get from nightmares that you only partially remember. I know there are some very strong feelings out there about the topic but this woman was almost deranged. I've experienced and witnessed many snide comments or 'looks' from other people for perceived childcare infringements but never to this magnitude.

Has anyone else had anything like this happen to them??

Oh wow, I am so sorry to hear that you had to go through something like that! I couldn't even begin to imagine how horrible it must've been for you!

People really need to keep their opinions to themselves at times. There is no right or wrong way when it comes to rearing a child. My daughter who is 6 now, was breast fed for 2 weeks. She didn't latch on properly and my milk supply just did not come in even with trying to express to stimulate it. Had anyone ever come to me and said anything like this, I would have been heartbroken.

The thing is, only you know what is best for your child and yourself. Don't even listen to those women. They clearly have nothing better to do than to gang up on people they don't know. Just keep being an awesome mum, you are never going to please everyone with how you raise your child, but as long as you know you're doing the best by you and your child, who cares?

I hope you feel better after that indecent assault on your parenting skills.

xo

Am I ready your post right - your baby is 14 MONTHS old? So she's pretty much a toddler?
What kind of lunatic women would abuse someone for giving a toddler milk out of a bottle?!
You poor thing, I hope you're feeling OK now. I bet there are a few things you wish you'd said now that things have calmed down wink
I breast fed my 1st until 3 months & my 2nd until 2 months (she was mixed fed from day 1 though).
My little boy is now 4 months old & we're still going strong breast feeding which I'm hugely proud of. He's already a biter so once those teeth come through he'll probably be weaned!
You should be really proud too that your little one is still getting breast milk.

I've never had anything like that happen to me, but have some pretty rude come-backs ready just in case it does in the future!

Kirsty-72 wrote:
Am I ready your post right - your baby is 14 MONTHS old? So she's pretty much a toddler?
What kind of lunatic women would abuse someone for giving a toddler milk out of a bottle?!

Hi Kirsty,
Yes she is a toddler and even though she's small for her age nobody would think she's under a year old so it was really weird. She had just eaten most of the sandwich we were sharing too so it was quite obvious that she's not a milk only baby.

It took so long for my brain to click into gear as I just couldn't process the fact that this random woman was yelling at me. Then I had to try and stay calm so that I didn't upset my daughter more by yelling back. I would have ripped into her more about scaring my daughter senseless than the whole bottle thing but by then they were yelling at the others for butting in.

You'd think she saw me giving my daughter a double-shot expresso for the way she reacted. It just boggles the mind.

Oh god what a psycho!!

At 14 months it could just be cows milk!! My daughter was breastfed to 12 months but after that it was just cows milk and food. So weird to be attacked like that.

That said I've had some rude comments when my daughter was barely 6 months along the lines of "You're STILL breastfeeding!? You should really get her onto a bottle now she's a bit old for that." So you CAN NOT win!

steph19 wrote:
That said I've had some rude comments when my daughter was barely 6 months along the lines of "You're STILL breastfeeding!? You should really get her onto a bottle now she's a bit old for that." So you CAN NOT win!

Hi Steph,
I know what you mean, I have had a few people hit me up about still breast feeding and one sister-in-law who said it's "weird and creepy" and you would assume correctly that she doesn't have any children.

My daughter usually only gets one milk feed first thing in the morning and another just before she goes to bed at night, but we just found out that I'm pregnant with number 2 so I've been taking some milk off during the day to relieve some pressure and it seems a waste to just throw it away.

Leah_1987 wrote:
steph19 wrote:
That said I've had some rude comments when my daughter was barely 6 months along the lines of "You're STILL breastfeeding!? You should really get her onto a bottle now she's a bit old for that." So you CAN NOT win!

Hi Steph,
I know what you mean, I have had a few people hit me up about still breast feeding and one sister-in-law who said it's "weird and creepy" and you would assume correctly that she doesn't have any children.

My daughter usually only gets one milk feed first thing in the morning and another just before she goes to bed at night, but we just found out that I'm pregnant with number 2 so I've been taking some milk off during the day to relieve some pressure and it seems a waste to just throw it away.

No way! That's liquid gold right there.
It's not like you feed her in a packed cafe on the boob as they get older. I mean like you say it's generally morning and night, so don't know why it bothers people so much! But obviously if you don't you'll also get criticized just like the OP. People need to mind there own business more...

Wow.

I hope you have recovered from this terrible act of mankind. These "women" should be ashamed. They're either really unhappy with life or maybe just got dealt a few bad cards in life making them bitter.

We need to stick together, be positive & raise our beautiful blessings in a positive and reassuring environment.

Try to ignore the unwanted looks and comments. You're an awesome Mum giving your child the best chance in life.. Breast milk or formula, your child is loved and nurtured, not abused and left to starve like so many unfortunate little kiddies are in the world!

I wish you and your little family all the best smile

and she the said you dont deserve to be a parent hahah gosh more like the way around.. Sorry you had to go through that.. I would have punched the bitches. Telling you whats wrong is right isnt their decision. What nut jobs.. Next time something happens as crazy as that get your phone our and start recording them..