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New mum who doesn't have mum of her own Lock Rss

Hi Helen and all other mum's following this post,

I am so glad we have all been able to come here and share our feelings. The song above is beautiful and so very true.

I hope we can continue to share our thoughts and feelings here as it has been very theraputic and comforting for me.

I have another idea for us mum's without mum's. How about sharing a special memory you have with your mum...? It could be anything at all...

I will have to go away and think about this one... but look forward to hearing what your special memories are.

Michelle smile
Hi Michelle and everyone else,

What a lovely idea!

I can't think of one specific memory at the moment, but always remember mum always being there! She drove us to our hockey games every sat, training at least once a week, took us to our basketball games and to those trainings too! She was so involved in my sisters and mines lives, and loved every moment of it!

I will try and think of a special time....


DD5, DS3, DS lost to SIDS at 6mths & DD6m

Hello all,

Here is one of my special memories...

When I was about 5 my mum told me a story about when she was a little girl, she had a pet guinea pig called Princess and she only had 3 legs... everyone said the guinea pig should be put down but my mum absolutley refused. She had that pet for years until it died from old age.

When I was 8 my mum bought me a pet guinea pig and I called him Gizmo (after the creature from the movie Gremlins) anyway I had this guinea pig which I loved and adored and would you believe that a few days after my mum died... my guinea pig died too. My guinea pig was 6 years old, so had reached old age for a guinea pig... but I made myself feel better by saying he went to keep my mum company.

I became a Veterinary Nurse as an adult so I could help look after the animals... and do you know I where I got my love of animals from...? My mum.

Michelle grin
Hi Girls,
Michelle, what a beautiful idea....
Mine is from my Grandma who was the one who raised me, and because i was th youngest of 11 kids (she had 10 of her own!) everyone said i was her favourite, she died 3 years ago and when she was her sickest, the night before she passed away, i went to see her and say my goodbye's. My Grandpa was there and when i walked in he said "Look Helen, Sarah's here!" sha had been in a coma for about 4 days and hadn't spoken or anything, when my Grandpa said that actually smiled! I still cry everytime i remember that.
Thanx for letting me tell that story and thanx for your memories too!

Sarah,VIC 18mth daughter

hi guys. soory to hear about all of your losses, but in a way it makes me feel better coz i know that im not the only one now.
in 2001 we lost our mum in a car accident (she was drink driving) but theres more to it than that-there was a reason why she was driving, but thats still no excuse. and then 9 months later we lost our dad to cancer, im 20 now, but was only 17 at the time, and was the oldest out of all us kids. the public trustee kicked us out of our house and tried to take alot away from us but thank god someone we knew, knew how to get in touch with the premier of sa and he pulled some strings and we were given a housing trust place for 2 years and were allowed to keep all of dads things.(mum and dad werent together so all her stuff went to her partner)

it has been really tough. through my pregnancy i had pre-eclampsia and didnt have a great birth, all i wanted was my mum or my dad.
i was hospitalized in jan because my blood pressure went through the roof, and the hospital i was going to was where my dad passed away and they wanted me to stay in there on his anniversary-NO WAY! i got my way and they let me out a day early!

my baby lachlan is only 8 weeks old and he has had a few problems and every day i think to myself i wish i had my mum here. she was such a baby person, thats why she had 5 of her own!
i have my partners step mum and his mum, but they arent the same as the real thing. with my own mum i could ring her and ask her to come and help me and give me a few hours off and she would come straight away no matter what she was doing, but these other women have their own lives and their own children to look after.

the songs that we played at mums funeral were stairway to heaven, candle in the wind and the last farewell(roger whittikar) its the most beautiful song and my mum loved it. well she loved them all.. at my dads we played you are not alone by micheal jackson, when i die by no mercy and at the end we had pachebells canon playing when we all went to say one last goodbye. all of these songs make me cry!

i feel much better getting all of that off of my chest now! it just needs to be said every now and again, but i find the people who cant relate to what iam talking about are the ones who dont want to hear it or think i go on about it too much.

anyone who wants to chat with me do so, because its not very often i find people like yourselves in a similar situation!

kylie xxx

hi there,
i cant really imagine how you feel because i still have my mum but in february 2003 i tragically lost my 4yr old niece Emilee and 26yr old brother in law Darren (which was her father and my sisters ex) in whom i lived with i still really hurt as he rang me and told me that he would be home in 10mins.
the accident happened only 200m from home.
i seen what my sister went through with losing her little girl and almost losing another as her other daughter was thrown from the vehicle( the police said thats what saved her- strange hey) and i have since started scrapbooking and making cassette tapes of my self talking to my 2 girls.
i have also videotaped myself saying their 21st speeches, and their wedding day speech just so they know that ill be there no matter what happenes bwcause as we found out the hard way tradgedies do happen to us and not just to other people.
just an idea.
Tracey ( daughters Enica-louise & Krystal-emilee)

Tracey-daughters Enica & Krystal EDD 28/7/04

Hi Tracey,

Firstly, i am so sorry to read your post about losing your neice and brother in law. Why is life so unfair sometimes??

What a very tragic story! There is something that just bites me when you hear stories of losing children! I can understand the pain you must feel, if i lost a niece or nephew it would be the next worse thing, after my own.

I haven't done any scrapping myself, but have heard how theraputic it can be.

Take care,


DD5, DS3, DS lost to SIDS at 6mths & DD6m

hi tepe,
yes it is really therapeutic,
and they turn out really cute too but you really do need the time,and with a 3.5 yr old and a 11month old i dont have much of it ,it takes me a little while to finish an album but its well worth it in the end.

good to hear from you!

Tracey-daughters Enica & Krystal EDD 28/7/04

Hi there!
I can relate to you completely. Throughout my pregnancy my poor Mum was in hospital for over 3months, which was really tiring when I was working, and visiting her in rehab etc. She came out of hospital 2 weeks before Lia was born, and was able to come to the hospital a couple of times to visit me. Unfortunately the day after I came out with a new bub, Mum went back in, and only lasted 3 weeks.
My life was a blur with a new baby, and the grief and shock of losing my mother so quickly. I think it only began to really hit me when Lia turned one (November 03).
I still miss Mum every single day. Physically she never would have been well enough to be able to babysit etc, but just to have her advice, and have her support is something other people take for granted, I think.
I'm very lucky to have a wonderful mum-in-law who would do anything for us, but it's still not the same.
My sister, coincidentally, had a baby just 3 months before me, so we're both lucky to live close by, and see each other a couple of times a week. Even though we have each other, we both still miss Mum when the going gets tough.
Hopefully it well get easier as time goes by.
Hope you are going well anyway! Cheers.

Kim and Lia Tas

Hi Tracey,

I am very sorry for your loss. It really doesn't make sense to me why anyone has to die young... but a child - that is a real tragedy. :'(

If you beleive that things happen for a reason, this is the only thing I can see that came out of it... you have a stronger desire to make sure that you do as much for your children as you can before it is too late.

That is the thing about a tragedy like this... it makes you value life so much more.

My heart aches for your loss and I hope each day you feel a little better. You have 2 very lucky daughter's... with a mum like you they will never be in doubt of how much you love them.

I have taken your ideas on board too.


Michelle smile
Hi Kylie,

Sorry to hear about the terrible loss of both your parents, within 12 months, that must have been tough to handle! Losing one for me was tough enough. You have also had a lot to deal with yourself. Please sit back and realise this, and see how strong a person you are to come thru it all!

The songs that were chosen for your parents funerals are all lovely and very memorable.

I hope you find some comfort in reading this thread, and in knowing you are not alone in your feelings. I am glad you already feel a bit better just getting it all out!

Hope you pop back and say Hi,


DD5, DS3, DS lost to SIDS at 6mths & DD6m

Hi pkl,

Sorry for the loss of your mum, it sounded like a very tiring time for you, especially being pregnant or with a new bub. I really cannot imagine the mixed emotions you must have felt during that time, watching someone come into the world and then someone leaving!

I am lucky too that i have my sister as my best friend, i really don't know what i would do without her!

As for time making things easier, yes i guess it does as we get use to the idea! I lost my mum nearly 11 years ago, and although the pain is still there, i guess i am use to it!

Hope to hear more from you,


DD5, DS3, DS lost to SIDS at 6mths & DD6m

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