Huggies Forum

CAn your love stretch Lock Rss

I guesss this a question for people with more than one child, I have a beautiful daughter who is very special to me as i have had a miscarriage before falling with her and now she is turning 1 in 3 weeks I would like to start ttc#2 by end of year but im so scared that i wont be able to love another as much As I love her and everyone tells me that every mother as this thought at some point and i will love another as much as her, Just wondering did any of the huggies mum had this thought or is just me.

Hi there....

yes it crossed my mind many times. My eldest son Luke is 3 and he is a surviving twin, we lost his sister at birth and for 3 yrs he was the love of my life (and still is) but when I fell pregnant with my second son I had to question my ability to love another child like I do for Luke.

It turns out that I love them both more then anything in the world and yes Luke was my first born but I have as much love for both of them.

Both are very special to me and yet so so different.

I do think it's a normal part of motherhood. And to think some mums have 5 or 6 kids...like my mum and she had more then enough love to go around.

take care and good luck with ttc.

Joey.
Mum to twins Luke 3yrs & ~Rhiarna~ my angel in heaven .... and chubba bubba Ryan 5mths.

Luke & ~Rhiarna~ 13.05.04 & Ryan 26.03.07

in short YES your love can stretch although it's not how I would describe it.
I have 4 beautiful children & each & every one of them is the most important person in my life.
My love for 1 did not get any less with the birth of another my heart grew larger to accomadate the extra love I felt.

S

I was amazed as to how much love i actually had to give i love all 4 of my kids very much and all just as equal

PM Me For a link to an awesome site

I think it is a thought that crosses most of our minds, but love does not stretch, you just have more love inside you to give that you didn't know was there. It sounds stupid, but I can't think of any way else to say it. Just think of love as a full bank account. You had an 'account' with your DH then a new one opened for your fist child, and another will open with your second. Hope that makes sense!!
hi,

Yes your love can stretch to accomodate more children. I love my 3 girls equally.

The best thing I have ever heard that explains the ability to love subsequent children- comes from Dr Phil and I have quoted it here before.

Think of your love for your children like bank accounts- you draw from seperate accounts for each child. So loving one child is not detrimental and does not reduce the love you feel for your other child/children.

thats a great way of desribing it,it totally makes sense, I know i have a lot of love to give,i just dont know why im so scared

Posted by: deegreen
hi,

Yes your love can stretch to accomodate more children. I love my 3 girls equally.

The best thing I have ever heard that explains the ability to love subsequent children- comes from Dr Phil and I have quoted it here before.

Think of your love for your children like bank accounts- you draw from seperate accounts for each child. So loving one child is not detrimental and does not reduce the love you feel for your other child/children.



Ah ha!! That is where I had heard it before!! You said it better then I did!! I knew 'someone' had said it!!

Ha,ha Kate- Great minds think alike,lol. You must have posted your response while I was typing mine.

It really is a good exlpanation though- that's probably why it is tucked up in my memory bank.
you know i have been thinking the exact ame thing for a little while now, we are not TTC, but people keep asking me when we're having another (she is only 7 months! give me a break people!) and DP has been asking me how many kids i want.
i can only see myself loving one child, and being fair with one child. its weird, i know i will probably change my mind and we will probably have 2 possibly 3 kids. but i dont know if i could love another child the same.
its a strange feeling, but i'm so glad i'm not the onnly one who feels like this.
I definately thought about it while pregnant with #2. We planned to have him, but it happened earlier than I thought so I wasn't really prepared for him. I was really concerned that I wouldn't love him the same as my first born. It just didn't feel the same as when I was pregnant with our first.

As soon as he was born, well at least once I was back in my room, I couldn't get enough of him. When it was just me and him, the whole world could have stopped and I wouldn't have noticed. He is adorable and I love him intensely. I love them both the same, but also very different. Number one is my "first born", and number two is "my baby". My "baby" will be one next month..... but he'll always be my baby.

to be honest i didnt have that thought, i akways thought how could i love anything more than jy but i knew i would love zak when he came along. and you love stretches as much as you need it to, you would love 10 kids the same.
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